In My Life

Resilience

2011-07-10T20:55:00.000-07:00

"Resilience" in psychology is the positive capacity of people to cope with stress and adversity. This coping may result in the individual “bouncing back” to a previous state of normal functioning, or using the experience of exposure to adversity to produce a “steeling effect” and function better than expected.

For a very long time the quality of resilience has been one that has interested me. I could not believe some of the things people endure and stay well adjusted kind human beings. Where others who suffer little more than minor disappointments are selfish ruthless narcissists.

Irregardless of the life a person leads suffering does not discriminate. No one manages to escape the hardships life has to offer, and there are no get out of jail free passes. No matter how much you suffer or when it happens in your life there is no quota a person can fill and then be free of such burdens.

So for me resilience is of great fundamental importance.

I read a book once about stress relief. In the book it talked about dire circumstances and how people who survive this often can imagine themselves or day dream in such a creative and vivid way that they create a mental retreat or space for them to retreat within and escape their situation. The common term for this is escapism and its recommend that a person participate in such behaviors until they achieve some measure of agency to transcend or change their pilate.

In the film Precious the main character was born into dysfunction and through out the film when times would get hideously unbearable you would watch the main character stare into a photograph of her mother and then the image would come to life and say all the caring and nurturing things a mother should say.

It dawned on me during these escapism moments of the film that it takes a naturally creative person to create these imaginative moments that set the stage for resilience to occur. And despite the circumstances that surrounded the character Precious and whatever fate was to befall her or the people she was created to represent it was that strength and that resilience that inspired people to make a film that touched lives and exists to create a permanent legacy / tribute. To tell a story that has the potential to impact and influence for life times to come.

The Story of Creation:

Genesis 1:1
1 In the beginning, when God created the universe...

As Christians we strive to emulate the qualities and characteristics of not only Christ, but the entire Holy Trinity. The character Precious and the people who utilize escapism creating for themselves a mental sanctuary or holy refuge to self preserve are displaying and participating in God's character. And thus in the same way he transcends and is timeless they rise above and conquer and over come.

More and more Churches are excited to display creative works from their family of believers and have taken an active interest in the arts or arts ministries. I applaud this effort to reconnect what originated with God who created all things and provide more spaces for imagination and creativity.

It is only when we emulate the qualities of Christ and participate in His divine character that we achieve Christianity!

Coaching

2010-10-22T17:51:00.000-07:00

After talking with three coaches two I respect and one I do NOT. I have come to some foundational truths about things.

1. Individuals go into coaching any sport for a variety of motivations. Optimally you want someone who :

a. knows the sport.

b. knows how to improve a person in the sport.

c. Keeps the best interest of kids (holistic development) at the center of all events surrounding the interaction with the student. The sport just being a conduit for their further development.

2. Individuals who lack the above will compensate for this in less than optimal ways.

The kicker is if they earn lots of W then they get to stay in their position. That's how Grover won this case. :(

Its not a gradual decent into asshole dome. Either they were from the start, or their lack of the above three lends its self to poor compensations. That ultimately hurts kids.

Differentiation

2010-07-22T11:47:00.000-07:00

" I changed by not changing at all" Pearl Jam Elderly Woman in a Small Town Behind a Counter

There are organizations that pride themselves on being resistant to change. Churches fall heavily into this vein of institution. The goal more often than not is to invite people in from outside the institution and then change them into conformity through a variety of tactics. Rather than believing that the people coming in might have much to offer the church their worth is reduced to the enthusiasm of newly found faith. The encouragement of an individual surrendering themselves to the agree upon congregations notions on the will of God. Or if the individual is already a person who believes Christ was the son of God who sacrificed his life for their sins and understands their salvation rests upon this internalized faith then it becomes a matter of how to get them volunteering. After the individuals salvation has been dealt with all other secondary issues become a matter of Spiritual Maturity.

Agreement with the status quo is percieved as growth. Rejection of ideas held by the individuals who control the interpretation of the scriptures is percieved as spiritual immaturity, opposing world view to scripture, or people are politely shown the door and encouraged to find another body to belong to.

I wrote The Myth and The Strawman in 2005 five years later...even with the changing hands of leadership, and the blip of hope with women teaching on tithe and offering....engendered dead 2010 year old language becomes the straw that broke the camels back.

All Churches participate in this resistance to change to varying degrees. The fear of change arising from the effort of each Church to be in the world but not of the world. Being in the world but not of it is a very tedious behavior to accomplish.

Essentially it begs the question how should we go about differentiating ourselves.

If the ways you differentiate include keeping females out of leadership well that isn't different its just outdated. This is a worldly perspective held from the days of the Old Testament. America enjoyed centuries of female oppression that lead to exploited child labor and widows without agency to provide for their children or themselves. That is nothing new that Christ didn't try to change verbally and in his actions from the beginning of his ministering years and the with those he appeared to directly after the resurrection.

If the ways you differentiate include a deep care and concern for the well being of the poor then it can not stop at that conviction alone it must be backed by action. With a food pantry or shelter or providing a soup kitchen.

If the ways of differentiation include boycotting secular books or television shows. I have never met a person who felt compelled to follow Christ because a Christian didn't watch Jersey Shores.

I have however met dozens of people who have been inspired and encouraged in the faith of Christianity by the soon to be sainted Mother Theresa or Martin Luther King.

Two glories to Christ who stood inside the world against the grain of the culture not parallel to it.

Pray with me.....

The Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Break ups

2010-07-13T21:03:00.000-07:00

I'm Gonna Find Another You lyrics John Mayer

It's really over, you made your stand
You got me crying, as well as you planned
But when my loneliness is through, I'm gonna find another you

You take your sweaters
You take your time
You might have your reasons but you will never have my rhymes
I'm gonna sing my way away from blue
I'm gonna find another you

When I was your lover
No one else would do
If I'm forced to find another, I hope she looks like you
Yeah and she's nicer too

So go on baby
Make your little get away
My pride will keep me company
And you just gave yours all away
Now I'm gonna dress myself for two
Once for me and once for someone new
I'm gonna do somethings you wouldn't let me do
Oh I'm gonna find another you

Break ups are interesting. Some leave you ransacked others your relieved to move forward.

Kel and I have left our Church. Its been an interesting process so far. I'd say pretty anti-climactic. This song expresses how I feel nicely. Especially the line I'M GONNA DO SOMETHINGS YOU WOULDN'T LET ME DO.....OH I'M GONNA FIND ANOTHER YOU!!

"Speaking of finding another you we have actually not made it much past our first pit stop. I sincerely believe if this church had been in town when we first moved here we would have belonged from the very beginning. Sometimes I think a discontented heart is the only way God gets us to move."

Notions on Accomplishment

2010-06-10T17:52:00.000-07:00

Ash: Yes, I can hear you.

Ripley: What was your special order?

Ash: You read it. I thought it was clear.

Ripley: What was it?

Ash: Bring back life form. Priority One. All other priorities rescinded.

Parker: The damn company. What about our lives, you son of a bitch?

Ash: I repeat, all other priorities are rescinded.

Ripley: How do we kill it Ash? There's gotta be a way of killing it, how, *how* do we do it?

Ash: You can't.

Parker: That's bullshit.

Ash: You still don't understand what you're dealing with, do you? Perfect organism. Its structural perfection is matched only by its hostility.

Lambert: You admire it.

Ash: I admire its purity. A survivor... unclouded by conscience, remorse, or delusions of morality.

Parker: Look, I am - I've heard enough of this, and I'm asking you to pull the plug.

Ash: [Ripley goes to disconnect Ash, who interrupts] Last word.

Ripley: What?

Ash: I can't lie to you about your chances, but... you have my sympathies.

Sometimes Perfection is OVERATED!!

Made

2010-06-01T18:45:00.000-07:00

There is a film with Jon Favreau and Vince Vaughn about boxers who worked for a crooked gangster. Vince's character is interested in moving deeper into the ranks of the crime ring and teeters on the fence of crooked behaviors himself always scheming and scamming off the assignments the mob boss assigns him.
This stupid yet overt display of deviant behavior makes Vince perfect for remedial crime work, but keeps him off the list for higher ranking positions at the hands of his sloppy careless handling of situations.
However his b.f.f. Favreau's character is sharp and has a measure of talent for boxing but finds himself mixed up with shady characters, and in love with this gorgeous drug addicted stripper and her kid. His connection to the woman keeps his heart and his head entangled in the boxing crime ring as he attempts to make enough money to earn their way out of this destitute life style.
Vince and Jon end up landing an opportunity that affords them the chance to move up the ranks in the crime circuit, but Jon wants out if he does the job and Vince wants to move up.
Crime boss says complete the job and then see how you feel.
They complete the task, and all the while Vince is pressuring him to let this get them "MADE."
When they get back Jon still chooses to get out all together, and Vince with much hesitation chooses to follow him. When Jon gets home and has essentially earned his and his girls freedom he finds her high as a kite cheating on him. She then kicks him out saying she likes the life she leads.
So he leaves a heart broken guy who gave a lot and took the only good thing there was to take out of the whole circumstance............dramatic pause...........................THE KID!

The innocent little girl who did not deserve the life that was about to unfold for her being born to a drug addicted stripper.

So there goes the stories cowboy with the only two worth while elements to take out of the experience the kid and the b.f.f. Cut the rest loose, and he was better off than everything he left behind.

I remember telling the dude who recommended this film to me that it made me cry. They thought it was because I identified with the stripper. Which says more about his perspective of beautiful women and their purpose in his perceptions.

But what did it was the last frame of the film where these two guys that had just been through a very tedious ordeal for to save a chick who didn't want their grace sitting at a table for three eating pancakes discussing the future of the little girl.

Tough guys with BIG HEARTS!! Nails me every time. :)

Recently I endorsed a dude and the chips fell much like they did for Jon. My intentions were pure, but dude was about as honest as the stripper. So I shake the sand from shoes grab my b.f.f and keep my focus on the kids. Thanks Dude for the reminder of my proprieties.

Hammock Instructions

2010-04-09T19:55:00.000-07:00

Now that is how its done.

The Worst

2010-03-20T06:18:00.000-07:00

When singing songs of scariness

Of bloodiness and hairiness,

I feel obligated at this moment to remind you

Of the most ferocious beast of all:

Three thousand pounds and nine feet tall -

The Glurpy Sluryp Skakagrall -

Who's standing right behind you!

Silverstein : Where the Sidewalk Ends

In relationships class we have been discussing abusive relationships. These are not necessarily gender specific but can happen in varying degrees to any individual. Its reminded me of this dream I at the end of the summer. August 16th I had a nightmare, and Its rare that I remember my dreams but this one was vivid and I couldn't shake the details for days. I wrote to a friend.

I had the worst nightmare last night.
I was standing on a street at night. It was a dark and menacing area probably some place I never should have been, but there I was vibrant, smiling, and talking with a friend. A hideous kind of (roughly the size of a buffalo) mass of pulsating veins, brain matter, and slime sludged toward me. But I didn't notice because my back was turned until it was right next to me. It creeped up.

My friend ran out of the way, but it had two short tentacle arms and at the ends instead of hands it had metal paddles with pointed hooks all over the inner sides. It gripped me between the paddles and then each breath I took went into the creature, and each pump of my heart coursed through its veins, and I was made to carry its heavy weight around as it feed off my life. I shrunk and withered, and it kept me alive with drops of water on my tongue. I could hear its labored breath as it took my life, but never seemed content just needing more and more. Relentless even. The memory of it leaves me feeling weak, gaging, and exhausted.

The pulsating mass held me up to give me drops of water and I took the moment of nourishment to bring my feet up using the pressure of the back one to kick the front one away tearing the paddles out of my chest. I dropped to the ground clawed my way away from the thing knowing my very life depended on it. With out me to sustain the mass it was very slow. Kel said I was shaking during the dream so violently it woke him up.

I believe this was my subconscious alerting me to the life sucking vortexes in my life. The people who take and take, capitalizing on all your good qualities, and using them against you for their own personal gain. The arrogant that falsely comes across as confidence who genuinely have so little self esteem they transmit their ego from the friends they surround themselves with, hiding in the middle of a bunch of good people like camouflage. Like the interview candidate who has all the right answers and looks picture perfect on paper, but turns to be The Worst hire.

I am ETERNALLY grateful to have escaped. But feel compelled to warn others of their impending presence how they lurk. If the person makes you feel :
Confined
Constricted
Bound
Bullied,
Immature
Do you feel like you need permission to act natural around them
Like they know what is better for you than you do,
Do they dangle things you want in font of you then never deliver,
Do you make excuses for their harmful / hurtful behaviors
If they act inconsistently
They isolate you in anyways they can (you may already be isolated if you are new to an area).
Does their natural demeanor insight feelings of misery / self doubt for you.
Scrutinize your clothing.
Lie
Manipulate
Are forceful during sexual activity
Ask you to keep secrets for the sake of the relationship

These are all red flag indicators that this is person harmful. That they are controlling. Its relational violence, and the person needs professional help.

Preperation

2010-03-13T10:43:00.000-08:00

Bible Club Lesson

Intro: Ask how many of you went to Homecoming? Ask one or two to talk about what they did to prepare for the BIG Night…….Ask them if they belong to a club or sports team, or how Hannah prepared for Sergeant Peppers Choir event? How do they get ready every morning for school?

Ask the Students what they know about the Nazirite Vow?

Read Numbers 6: 1-8
“The Lord said to Moses. Speak to the Israelites and say to them: If a man or woman wants to make a special vow a vow of separation to the Lord as a Nazirite, he must abstain from wine and other fermented drink and must not drink vinegar made from wine or from other fermented drink. He must not drink grape juice or eat grapes or raisins. As long as he / she is he is a Nazirite, he must not eat anything that comes from the grapevine, not even the seeds or skins. During the entire period of his vow of separation no razor may be used on his head. He must be holy until the period of separation to the Lord is over; he must let the hair of his head grow long. Throughout the period of his separation to the Lord he must not nor near a dead body. Even if his own father or mother or brother or sister dies, he must not make himself ceremonially unclean on account of them, because the symbol of his separation to God is on his head. Throughout the period of his separation he is consecrated to the Lord.

What are the things God asks of a person that is going to undergo Nazirite Vows?
Why would God make such demands in this vow?
How do you prepare personally for any service or ways in which you would like to be used as God’s instrument?

Read the Story of Samson Birth Judges 13: 3-7

The angle of the Lord appeared to her and said “ you are sterile and childless, but you are going to conceive and have a son. Now see to it that you drink now wine or other fermented drink and that you do not eat anything unclean, because you will conceive and give birth to a son. Now see to it that you drink no wine or other fermented drink and that you do not eat anything unclean, because you will conceive and give birth to a son. No razor may be used on his head, because the boy is to be a Nazirite, set apart to God from birth, and eh will begin the deliverance of Isreal from the hands of the Philistines. Then the woman went to her husband and told him, “ A man of God came to me. He looked like an Angel of God, very awesome. I didn’t ask him where he came from, and he didn’t tell me his name. But he said to me , You will conceive and give birth to a son. Now then drink no win or other fermented drink, and do not eat anything unclean, because the boy will be a Nazirite of God from birth until the day of his death.”

I then told the story of Samson forensics style.

Did Samuel obey the Nazirite Vow?
How did God choose to use him in light of his sacrifices and obedience?
Can you think of a time God specifically used you for a purpose or instance?
(Tell story of church planter / apologetic met his wife)

New Testament Nazarite:

Read Luke 1: 8-15 and Mark 1: 4-6
Luke 1: 8-15
Once when Zechariah’s was on duty and he was serving as priest before God, he was chosen by lot, according to the custom of the priesthood to go in to the temple of the Lord and burn incense. And when the time for the burning of incense came, all the assembled worshipers were praying outside. Then and angel of the Lord appeared to him, standing at the right side of the alter of incense. When Zechariah saw him, he was startled and was gripped with fear. Bu the angel said to him: “Do not be afraid, Zechariah your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son and you are to give him the name John. He will be a joy and delight to you and many will rejoice because of his birth, for he will be great in the sight of the Lord. He is never to take wine or other fermented drink, and he will be filled with the Holy Spirit even from birth.
Mark 1: 4-6
And so John came baptizing in the desert region and preaching a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins. The whole Judean countryside and all the people of Jerusalem went out to him. Confessing their sins, they were baptized by him in the Jordan River. John wore clothing made of camel’s hair, with a leather belt around his waist, and he ate locusts and wild honey.

Describe the behavior of John the Baptist?
What is something you can do or not do to personally to prepare for serving Christ?
Have students share what they know or have experienced with Lent?

Challenge each other to be obedient and give a behavior sacrifice as preparation to always be used for Christ.

Read “Romans – 12: 1 therefore I urge you brothers in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices holy and pleasing to God this is your Spiritual act of worship.

Expo Night

2010-01-30T15:59:00.000-08:00

Monday Our School lets all the in coming freshman come and see all the school has to offer.

Here is promo video I made for the Relationships course.

Ode to the Heartbroken

2010-01-08T19:37:00.001-08:00

There is the really touching ballad by D.M.B entitled "Grace is Gone." You can listen and see a type of video of it here.
In life there are all sorts of instances that can break your heart. There is a sliding scale that ranges these matters from a say a sports team that consistently gets so close to winning the championship (ie Boston Red Sox pre. 2004) only to loose, to the dissolving of a love relationship, to the poor functioning of a church, to the suffering of the innocent in the world, to harm that might befall a relative, to senseless violence, co-workers, friends, family, and so on.

In 1st John 4: 7-8 " Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes form God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is Love!!"

When the world was made God commanded everything into existence. After this He still gave commands, but they weren't as directly followed. Case in point He commanded Adam and Eve not to eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, but as we all know the legend goes they didn't listen.
Once sin entered the world God pulled back from his creation. God can have no part in sin, so a receding occurs and He no longer walks with Adam in Paradise only His essence The Holy Spirit remains for a time.

Sometimes I think when circumstances break your heart in such a way that it threatens your very person then it is absolutely Christ like to recede. To self preserve. It is often times in our failures that new and better solutions are discovered, innovations take place, and clarity.

When you have nothing left to loose, because what you held most dear has already been jeopardized or compromised a new plan settles in that could produce such joy the recipients of which number more than all the stars in the sky. Genesis 26: 4 "I will confirm the oath I sore to your father Abraham. I will make your descendants as numerous as the Stars in the sky..."

Chief

2009-11-28T11:44:00.000-08:00

I am notably a competitive person. So much so that I can't play card games because of how much my competitive streak rears its head. Like those who know better than to mess with temptation I steer clear of instances I know will get the better of me. Most of my competitive streak has now internalized and I compete solely with myself most people call it a perfectionist.

I was naturally nervous when I first accepted the coaching position out at Wilmot. I remember expressing my fear to other coaches about Bobby Nighting it and tossing a chair. My coach friend gave me the advice to keep it about the kids and their acceleration at the sport. I took that completely to heart, and even said if it becomes about anything else I'll quit.

Thinking back to even when I personally played athletics or took up running. If I wanted to improve I just listened to my coaches, stuck to the training, and worked as hard as I could. I never cheated or did anything other than congratulate and esteem the other players on my team. It never even occurred to me to be catty or form a clique.

Being on the other side of the fence I would never put an ineligible player out on the court or into competition. I would never play an injured kid, or advise my players to do anything physical to the other team to win. If a player were to actively move their hand at the end of a match to avoid congratulating I would make them shake each players hand and apologize for being a poor sport.

To be completely honest if a ref misses a call I do not draw attention to it. It goes both ways I am not the ref. I am the coach.

Sometimes people make compromises in order to win, and then they do. They get recognition, and advancements at the hands of their success. It can make it feel like integrity is a waste of time.

The reality is nothing can replace a pure win. A win won where every player out there could be and should be. If you do a bunch of underhanded shady and sleazy things just to earn the W. Then even if you admired you are just the chief of jerks. Commander of sleazy tactics, or the champion of false victory. Raise the banner of perverted adoration high and swing it above the head to the devils delight.

I love to win as much as any coach, but have no aspiration to be the Chief of the Jerks no matter how big the trophy.

Not for Kids

2009-10-20T11:41:00.000-07:00

I know you are just dying to hear if I liked Where the Wild Thing Are, or if it was a let down

........ Dramatic Pause........
It has likely taken over my number two spot for all time favorite films second only to Dead Poet Society and just above Terminator 3.
It is NOT a kids flick. The messages are run pretty deep, and the wild things made Audrey jump a couple times. But Faith was never scared.

Spike Jonzes wanted to create a film from the perspective of a 9 year old boy who was essentially created to save his folks marriage, and he could no more sustain the pressure or responsibility of that, than he could rule and be the king of a bunch of wild monsters.
The voice of the head monster was the guy from the Sopranos, and the range of frustration and helplessness he was able to convey was absolutely felt by every audience member. I mean you could totally see how anyone could put, so much hope in one thing ,or all their eggs in one basket, and then before it totally crumbles just smashing the whole thing, basket in all, to maintain some kind of sense of control. Capitol R...Riveting.

Now we make forts out of the couch and play Max. I play the trailer and do the piano Melody on their tummy's, and we howl together after dinner. Its awesome. The kids didn't really understand the film, but they like the silly monsters and the crazy boy. I tell them all boys are crazy, so get used to it. lololol :)

Kenosha Royalty

2009-09-17T19:23:00.000-07:00

This past weekend was the Wedding of my Sister and her fiance' Matt. Tiff and Matt were never lacking for friends and social invites. People I'd not seen in ages dusted off the coat tails to come out and celebrate the joining of two incredible people. If Kenosha ever did have a Royal Family Tiff and Matt would likely be in it. :)

The flowers that accompanied a set of Diamond earrings waiting at my folks house were we all got ready for the church.

Mr. and Mrs. Gename married at Immanuel Baptist Church in Kenosha

Kel and I @ the Milwaukee art Museum for photo ops. The photographer asked me to move his car. What!?!

Me stealing a smooch on the Bus.

Very Ginger and Fred.

My Dad bringing down the house.

Audery didn't make it down, but Faith was a total pro.

Just like the old days.

Tiff, Tim & I. Tim and I were best buds since the Sandbox.

Good for us!

2009-09-02T19:16:00.000-07:00

Faith looking like she off to college.

Faith started Kindergarten on Tuesday. I know that this can be traumatic for some parents, but I get this image of a 30 year old woman education less still sleeping in her hello kitty bed. This mental picture takes the sting right out, and I know this is not only very good for her. Its good for me.

I like her school, but its a bit over crowded. Well see how this year goes.

My Fave

2009-08-26T09:55:00.000-07:00

Dwight has a prodigal son feel. He has a very vibrant and connective past with the girls of O. town, but leaves them for Ava a manipulative man eater of a woman who uses all the most attractive elements of being female to gain power over the men in her life. Ava is beautiful, cunning, smart, skilled in the bedroom, and can play the role of a caring as well as endangered woman to earn an Oscar. She embodies all the characteristics of the more obvious or socially acceptable powers of the female sex, but uses them as weapons to gain power.

Dwight gets caught up in her schemes, and almost dies, but is recovered by the girls of O. town, and healed. In that healing he has an entirely different face, and there is a massive sense of homecoming and celebration reunited with his family who welcome him home with open arms.

Dwights love interest before he strays from the path is Gail the leader of all the femme fatals in O. town. She is strong, confident, independent, beautiful, and all in all pretty bad ass.

When two people get married they enter into the status of couple. Those who make it work always keep the other persons interests in the forefront of their decisions. There is some autonomy but with all the shared spaces home, car, meals, experiences, quirks, daily interactions, hopes, dreams, memories there is a certain amount of meshing that takes place. You are a team whose collective goal is the well being of them, you, and the children that could potentially enter the situation. In that meshing a certain amount of sacrifice ensues, and part of you surrenders for good of the whole.

Dwight realizes that to snare Gail would be to change who she is, and since he loves who she is he chooses to go without tying her down. He is content in his feelings and in his manhood to let her be the strong independent leader she is and would never dream of stifling that potential.

He calls her is Valkyrie woman always his and never his, and there is heat, and there is attraction, and there is passion, but no commitment. Because if they were to couple that would change her, and then she wouldn't be Gail. So instead he loves her as she is. They never possess one another.

Dwight is my favorite, and he and Gails story are very important. The film and the books are all done in black and white which I think suggests that things are modern the contrast of right and wrong distinct. The name Sin City the first contrast to the graphics. The second is in how the good guys are prostitutes, and the bad guys politicians and clergy. People are victims of their circumstances, and the powers holding the context in place. The only exaggerated ideas are the powers men and women embody. Men are strong, protective, sensitive, caring, heroes that the women need. Women are beautiful, smart, independent, sexy, have strong community together, and are vulnerable. It really displays how the sexes can sustain and support one another in a world of corruption, greed, and poor values. How each can be powerful in their own right, but to recognize those powers, their potential, and not abuse them or use them as weapons against each other. When we work for one anthers collective good everyone wins, but when we don't everyone looses.

Hands

2009-08-22T07:15:00.000-07:00

I remember the first time I watched the film Saving Private Ryan and sweating and ducking in my seat as soldiers fell on the beach front. I went again a week later with my mom and felt her grip and pull my arm down dozens of times during the same scene. That motherly instinct that makes a woman put her arm out when she has to stop fast at a traffic light kicking in as she tried to protect me from whizzing bullets and land minds.

It dawned on me after the third yank that I wasn't flinching. After a single viewing I was already desensitized. Kind of gross when you really think about it.

In the film Sin City the character Marv is depict as an enormous gladiator of a fellow who has been in so many battles his face has been permanently scared and disfigured. He also hallucinates the human carnage of bodies all around the city, but his life has seen so much bloody battle it might as well just be the common trash cans they really are. His greatest talent is killing, but that is not all that marketable or valuable of a skill outside of military service. So he wanders aimlessly alone, hallucinating, and drinking purposeless. Marv has a tender spot for dames, and zero tolerance for fellas who rough them up. Despite his menacing appearance and hyper aggression in the comics themselves he is constantly using his killing talent to save damsels in distress (protect and serve the innocent the defenceless :), and he is given the most fantastic lines like "She smelled like angels ought to smell." Not exactly the kind of thing you would think runs through a killing machines mind.

Marv is sought out by a call girl named Goldie, because she was in desperate need of protection. They share one intimate night together, and she is still murdered next him leaving her killers with a primo fall guy. Marv however goes all vigilanti and avenges Goldie's death. One informant was a priest and he essentially asks Marv if this whore is worth all he is doing. Marv responds "Worth killing for, Worth dying for, Worth going to hell for as he pumps him full of bullets.

Essentially Goldie's motivation was selfish. She was looking to save her life, and picked the guy she believed had the best shot at succeeding. She slept with him, but that was her job. She did not deserve his vengeance.

Marv however understood her motivations, and did not blame her having needs in the circumstance. But choose instead to see the need she met for him, and considered it kind that she would be with him despite all his obvious facial and personality hang ups.

His actions born out of kindness. He ends up bringing down a serial killer, and the corrupt head of the church. Not a decent guy, not a well adjusted guy, not a spotless role modle, but messy, gruff, complex, tender, caring, crazy. He like Haritgan also gets the chair for interfering with the people in power, and takes the wrap even for Goldie's death again not a heroes reward.

But hey kindness is pretty hard to come by. :)

2 Peter 1: 5-7 "For this very reason, make every effort to add ...kindness; and to brotherly kindness love. For if you possess these qualities in increasing measure, they will keep you from being ineffective and unproductive in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. But if anyone does not have them, hi is near sighted and blind, and has forgotten that he has been cleansed from his past sins."

I guess his 6 word memior would be "In the end only Kindness matters."

Poster Child

2009-08-19T07:12:00.000-07:00

In the film Sin City Bruce Willis plays the character of J. Haritgan a seasoned cop hell bent on nabbing a child molester and murder. Sadly this killer has been able to avid capture because he is the son of a powerful political figure of the city. His crimes have been looked past out of fear, personal gain, and power again leaving the innocent suffer and pay at the hands of corrupt hearts. Adolescent girls in desperate need of a protector a hero, and Haritgan despite age and an ailing ticker steps up to the plate. Albeit Hartigan was on the verge of retirement, and a heart attack which made him in a place with very little to loose. He also could have relied upon all the good he had already accomplished in his life, and quietly went onto peaceful retired bliss. But he opted instead to be the hero the girl needed. Big Sigh :)

The repercussions of this decision were bullet wounds, a long road to recovery, and being imprisoned for the very crimes he protected against. Not exactly a heroes reward. And the young life he saves goes on saturated in a world where the only power women are tapping into is their objectification and sex appeal becomes an exotic dancer. Appalling right!

But exactly the same kind of sacrifice Christ has made for each of us. He did not go to the cross for the behaviors that bring glory to God. He went for our transgressions to break down that barrier between us God's beloved children and Himself.

Sin City is very graphic and very gritty, and because of that not very many people will be able to get past these elements to digest some of the more pertinent messages. And I will likely be hard pressed to find too many Christians who have seen it, and this is tragic as well because its an exaggerated idea of what the world has become, but also dangerously accurate. Most of the time I think Christians have very little idea of what they are dealing with when it comes to the secular community, and they leave people ill equipped to deal with the struggles and challenges they are likely to face. The common headaches of personality clashes quickly become their cross to bear or "loving their enemies," and the mild annoyance gets labeled "suffering." And then that whole suffering for Christ gets a big check mark. When in reality were all pretty dam comfortable.

So the options become stay a cloistered community, and only bring outsiders in who will conform to the group demonizing everything on the outside to validate closing ones self off from this world going to hell in a hand basket. Or you engage the world and thus are viewed as watering down your faith, or fallen away.

How about we seek first to understand then be understood. Romans 8:37 "No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angles nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

Be a Hartigan we have NOTHING to loose. World do your worst!

Chasing Pavements

2009-08-12T06:10:00.000-07:00

In 3rd grade I was given a book that always started the same, but at each cliff hanger you were allowed to pick from two different options which path the characters would take next.
Should Ted and Nacy open the shut door or head down the long dark corridor? (insert high pitched organ chord. lol :)

Well dark corridor doesn't sound so inviting, so you pick the shut door only to find there was an Alien in the room who melts Ted and Nacy's face off. Blast tricked again by opting for the seemingly safer option. Eventually the goal for me became keeping the characters alive.

It seems to me as of late that life is series of choices, and as much as we would like to control the outcomes that unexpected alien could be at any turn ready to melt your face off.

I was having dinner with my friends Karlee and Zack Monday night, and we were laughing over a parents natural tendency to be over protective of their children. She was recently encouraged to own and be trained to use a firearm as a means of self protection. Now I would encourage any woman to take a self defense class, or even Karate, but weapons this isn't Croatia.

At any rate fear is a huge factor in the decision making process, but ultimately fear can only last as long as the consequence matters to the individual. For example oppression trying to keep people in places of great poverty, and threatening them with violence, force, or the fear of changing the status quo. But eventually whatever is being held over the persons head to keep them in line becomes irrelevant and an uprising occurs. And pictures get painted of heroes, and villains, and radicals, and patriots, traitors, vigilantes, and loyalists. Perspective dictating the label placed on each person's head.

Other factors in making choices may include values, morals, beliefs, skills, talents, passions, and your circumstances.

In general if your choices are not going to cause others great pain or harm to anyone then they are easy ones to make. But most choices don't fall into such nice easy lines. Most choices involve risk, and taking a chance.

The frustration for me is when people validate their decisions by putting down others. What a lousy way to be, and steeped in insecurity. We all search for validation in various ways, but what really constitutes a "good" decision or "bad" decision is neither the consequence or the result. Its the edification of participating in the practice of an idea. The very experience itself and the reflection of the actions that transpire. Letting them change you and refine you, the situation can be a history that can guide or influence the choices of others in hopes of a good outcome. But its cyclical because "good" again can be a matter of perspective.

Essentially I have chosen to live by the principal of the Bible, and in that most of my choices should lead me to actions that reflect the way Christ behaved, and things that will take me closer to God and sustain the relationship I have with the Holy Spirit. I try my best, and fall flat on my face all the time. I am just as susceptible to getting my face melted off by aliens as any other person being a Christian isn't any kind of get out of jail free card, and in a lot of way when you are bold about your ideas then you are scrutinized.

I guess I just kind of wish people were far less afraid to take a chance, far less afraid to fail, and far less apt to evaluate the choices they are shaky about by reaching for validation in all the wrong directions.

Like Adele sings "I've made up my mind don't need to think it over. If I'm wrong I am right don't need to look no further.... Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavements even if it leads no where."

The choices you make are what you make of them. :)

America's Got Talent

2009-08-07T17:23:00.000-07:00

Here is the study I wrote for our last Women's group of the summer.

1. Pray for the Spirit to bless our time in the word and in fellowship.

2. Ask everyone to take a moment and think about 5 things they are very good at. (ie. typing, singing, listening, problem solving, ect.)

3. Ask each person to share 1-2, and what made them think of them. Do they enjoy the things they are good at?

4. Read the Parable of the talents: Mathew 25: 14-28

* Ask for reactions / anything that stands out.

* What did the servants do with the talents?
* What was the masters response.
* Notice that people who use their talents are given even more.

We also broke the passage up into 14-21, 22-23, and 24-28 pausing to reflect after each.

5. How do you treat the talents God has given you?
Like a chore or a burden / or do you use them to bring Him glory.

6. Describe a time when your specific talents were used for God, or a time when you where lead to a situation where your talents could be used but you didn't act on it.

I call it the state of emergency (its a Bjork song ;), and it means when God is pushing you to make the necessary changes in your life to participate in His will for your life. Its the place where Jonah found himself and the Jews when they wondered around the desert for 40 years.

Because in my heart I earnestly believe that people are the most glorifying to God when they are participating in his will for their life completely. It is better to embrace what he has given you, and use if for his glory. Or you are likely to suffer and become pushed to that state of emergency when you are so broken you comply.

I had a wonderful time encouraging and being encouraged by my sisters in Christ during our study, and I hope you find it as valuable.

Shed Pilgrimage

2009-08-05T11:03:00.000-07:00

Last week Thursday my friend Pav. and I fought the cubs game traffic to make the Marschel family summer annual pilgrimage to the John C. Shed. Pav. was a total champ as Audrey chanted Daddy...Daddy...Daddy... for the entire last 10 min. of the drive, and treated the umbrella stroller like it was her Siamese twin. Check out the turtle rides over the years!

Faith's 1st Turtle Ride.

Faith still riding solo.

Audrey's first.

Faith's third.

Double the FUN!

Faith takes the first ride of '09

And once we could get Audrey to let go of the stroller we got the double shot. lol :)

I think after this day Pav. could have used a shot. lol ;)

Bet you all can't wait until the 2020 turtle ride pics are posted. Just imagine the disenchanted 16 and 15 year old faces of Faith and Audrey. I promise they will only have to stand next the turtle ridding will be optional. lol :)

W.T.W.T.A

2009-08-03T20:08:00.000-07:00

Took the girls to see G Force today and caught this trailer. LOVE IT!!

My Push for the Cartel

2009-07-27T07:24:00.000-07:00

Lately I've been hearing a lot of conversations about legalizing marijuana as a means of saving the economy. I don't really think this is legitimate as who in the world would want to be recognized in history as the president who legalized hemp, so despite some persuasive arguments a person just can't have that kind of overwhelming negative connotation linked to their public presence without significant ramifications. Essentially pride and the healthy apprehension towards drug use instilled by programs like D.A.R.E. and educational platforms that have worked hard to promote awareness and aversion to narcotics will keep legalization at bay.

I however would like to go on record to state that I do think drug pushers have got it all wrong. I'm not sure why they target the youth who have no money, and their whole lives a head of them to get hooked on drugs and ruin all that amazing potential. I really think they ought to solicit the elderly. They have made their fortune, and have a steady source of pension income. They aren't as likely to reproduce, so the risk of harming a fetus or damaging reproductive organs form producing quality typical zygotes and sperm is not a factor. They have been productive respectable contributors to the overall well being of American society, so haven't they earned the right to go out in a blaze of psychedelic glory.

Fool Proof

2009-07-24T17:55:00.000-07:00

If you ever find yourself infatuated with a person. The best solution to take them down a notch is to imagine them with a wicked case of diarrhea.

Tell me this would cure even the most illogical case of love goggles.

D.M.B.

2009-07-20T11:15:00.000-07:00

Last night I went with Art, Kristen, and Stephanie to see Dave Mathews Band at Alpine Valley. I had not seen D.M.B. since 1998, so the crowd of regulars had a grand time bringing me up to speed.

Where to even begin...the crowd was this radical mix of age groups and styles some total frat boy types, and other wild bohemians with wrap around dresses and dreadlocks. There was a buzz of excitement, but not any sort of out of control energy were you step around puddles of vomit every ten feet. There were murmured hopes of favorite tunes in every direction and like a wave a suggested song would jump from intimate circle to intimate circle of companions stretching across the valley and back like a game of telephone. One suggestion might lead to two or three more from an album and the only thing to stop the endless stream of name that Dave tune would be the need to sip a malt beverage, a drag of a smoke/joint (toss a coin lol ;), or even the slightest movement in the direction of the stage the anticipation of the bands appearance to initiate the performance despite drug or alcohol was an instant attention grabber.

The song set included but not limited to : Proudest Monkey to kick off, satellite, crash, dive in, you and me, alligator pie, 41, funny the way it is, Halloween, and Thank you...let me..be myself..again (to which Mathews broke out into dance during.) Actually it seemed like he didn't really sing very much. The crowd did more, and the instruments were incredible the drummer carrying almost all the bands energy.

People were so nice me. One fellow shared his sunflower seeds with me, and you could tell he was a devote fan knowing band members first names, as well as, hoping for songs that perform live in ways a c.d. could never capture. He was awesome. Then this guy leaving during the encore grabbed my arm and was like "Hey we were in line for tickets together." I just kind of said probably, and let him move on his merry way. Then I turned to my buddies and said "Yes the experience was just as memorable for me." lololol :) And we all had a great laugh!!

Dave is an amazing entertainer, and they had this 5 panel screen that gave such a clear crisp display of the musicians that even in such a large venue like Alpine Valley you still felt like you had a more personalized show. I can't even imagine what the people in the seats experienced with the screens and the band a stones throw away. The lights the sounds from the seats had to be unforgettable.

I absolutely in ways never experienced before understand dead heads, and phish followers as the crowd last night seemed so connected and even like a family. Some poor over served girl passed out on the incline wasn't scoffed at, chastised, or stepped on. She was encircled and wrapped in her sweater safe to sleep it off until the crowed disbanded for their car rides home. Thank you Kristen for the excellent company, and amazing concert. As Boggie would say "I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship. "

Table Talk

2009-07-16T08:24:00.000-07:00

Here is a website that gives hundreds of improve warm up ideas. However one that you can just do at the dinner table instead of asking how was your day. Which typically leads to one word responses, or the need for follow up questions. Painstakingly drawing from your child or spouse irrelevant details that end up being the equivalent to my day was same old same old. You can play a game. Everyone at the table is responsible for contributing one word to a sentence. Start out with regular sentences.

Mom says, " He"

Sister says, "took"

Dad says, "the"

You say, "snail."

Play again and everyone can say two words, and make longer sentences. Put parameters on the sentences. Make them all have to do with school, apples, movies, or their least / most favorite teacher. If the kids aren't saying silly words parents make sure to take the sentences in creative directions.

If someone says a very strange or alarming word pause before the next round to ask why they picked that word. Where did the inspiration come from. Sometimes you can unveil more about the persons day from the subconscious than you would just by asking directly.

This little game can kind of train a person to say unusual things in the midst of common place conversations. As little as 3 people and as many as 10 people can play. (Henery's four extra people won't mess it up, but maybe two tables of 7 would be better. lol ;) My suggestion is not to play this every night, but maybe once a week.

If anyone tries this please leave a comment about how it went. A friendly caution though milk has been witnessed flying from nostrils during the course of this game, so keep an extra napkin or set of paper towels close by. :)

Humor Me

2009-07-14T12:41:00.000-07:00

A couple years ago I visited the Milwaukee Art museum and saw an exhibt called cut. Which was about cinema and film splicing and editing. In one of the displays it was the song leaving on a jet plane covered by a female vocalist, and the video playing in time with the music was of men's diving. Now men's diving is initially kind of interesting to take in, but this was the same couple of dives over and over again for roughly 3 min. Despite the repetition the song was catchie that you still found yourself standing there for the entire duration. Under the display was a synopsis that talked about how Nazi's originally coined this technique. They would take fine Ariana specimens and set them on a rotating platform. Then they would parade them through the town while playing popular music of the time, in addition to, espousing their propaganda about genetics and race superiority. They noticed that the people swallowed the message more readily when it was set to popular music, and thus the music video was conceived.

I remember sitting through an in service once and watching a video about change, and embracing change with a tag line "Shift Happens," and the music was so catchie and the images so moving you couldn't help but want to be apart of it afterwards. Later I recalled the art exhibit, and in future in services remember to keep this manipulative tool in mind. Is this a good idea, or is someone very invested in mass amounts of people coming to terms or getting on board with a concept.

Its important to be critical of this as most of the time this is used in commercials or ads for people trying to persuade you to spend your almighty dollar on their brand. It is also used to get people to stay longer in clothing stores, because the longer you stay the more likely you are to buy.

And unlike other forms of promotion individuals don't seem to get tired of this type, nor has its effectiveness worn off.

Germans at the time of the Nazi's were a state of great poverty and anguish. They were desperate to believe in something that would save them from their hurting, so despite the birth of an incredibly manipulative promotional tool it would not have taken a whole lot to get people rallied around anything promising as much hope as the Nazis were.

I think a lot these days about adolescents. About all the promotional messages they get infiltrated with and the tools they have to filter out the garbage from the good. To navigate the complexities of the gray areas. I think the song "The Fear"very accurately what a lot of adolescents experience even if they are unaware of it:

Lilly Allen

I attended a course last summer where Chris Farley's brother the key note speaker. He talked about how adolescent raised in loving homes are given all kind of values and morals to combat a lot of what American culture lacks. However he said that once these children reach middle school its like they have been sent out on a boat with only their peers, and those relationships are vital to their survival. And one of the tools that can help an adolescent navigate those rough waters is humor.

Here is an example of a script he gave:

Sandy : "Hey Charlie you going to Allen's party on Friday its going to be a total blast with his folk being out of town."

Charlie : "I would but Flavor of Love is coming over to teach me how to tell time."

Or

Sandy : "There is going to be beer at the party."

Charlie : "Well I only attend parties where heroin and meth are available."

These quick little comebacks help the person doge the response, and distract. In the same way a block in volleyball deflects a hard driven spike from earning the opponent a kill. Its not only a good way to prevent the action its also impressive when it happens. Memorable even after a game finishes out.

You become that kid who makes everyone laugh, and who doesn't like the funny kid. Then the person is free to go to the party or not go to the party but save face in front of his buddies regardless.

You can practice this skill at home with your kids by doing a lot of the types of warm up activities improve groups do. I will post those warm ups in a day or two here.

I know that in a perfect world all our kids make perfect little friends who never pressure them to do anything wrong or naughty, but this just isn't realistic. Especially if they travel in even the most socially accepted secular circle (a.k.a. public school :).

The main speaker at Mean for More two years ago described the traumatic experience of boldly opting out of a party, and the popularity repercussions that followed that bold assertion. Of course she survived and of course she is stronger for having gone through that trial. But having that same expectation for every kid is an enormous error, and maybe this is just what your kid needs.

Let us not forget :

Matthew 10:16 (New International Version)

"I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves."

Fatal Attraction

2009-07-13T18:30:00.000-07:00

I really need to quick address something I heard this a.m. on Q101. The D.J.'s were talking about Steve McNair being shot by his Mistress, and they posed the question about weather or not it is now safe to date 20 something women for listeners to call in.
For those of you who have not heard the story McNair was sleeping with another woman who shot him several times before taking her own life over the 4th of July.
The people who called in were relentless saying that all these girls want to do is party and go on vacations, and its fun at first, but they have no concept of a work ethic. And eventually a man gets tired of "parenting" them. The second caller said that everything the first caller said was true, but his girlfriend was just out of control in bed. Which was met by a round of applause, and cheers. GAG!!

FACT: In 2005, 1,181 women were murdered by an intimate partner. That's an average of three women every day. Of all the women murdered in the U.S., about one-third were killed by an intimate partner.

FACT: 32% of women raped are between the ages of 12 and 17. 64% of women who reported being raped, physically assaulted, and/or stalked since age 18 were victimized by a current or former husband, cohabiting partner, boyfriend, or date.

FACT: Men perpetrate the majority of violent acts against women (DeLahunta 1997).

FACT: Every two minutes, somewhere in America, someone is sexually assaulted.

For more facts about Violence against Women you can check out this.

There is not a designated age for the men committing these acts of violence, so perhaps then women should just swear off all men. And the only reason this has made the news besides the fact that the victim was famous is because its strange. Women don't typically pull stunts like this, and the adverse reaction is help keep it that way. 20 something women a threat please men are more likely to be stung to death by bees which evidently cause 30 deaths each year. Find out how many men are running around with full body insect nets? Pose that question in your pipe and smoke it Q101.

Untapped Markets

2009-07-01T10:59:00.001-07:00

*Warning twilight details will be revealed*

It all started over dinner with Jake and his latest flavor of the month. I always like meeting Jake's love interests.
Sophie was studding to get her librarian license, and aspired to develop a middle school program that ran against the grain of disconnect that takes place between childhood and adulthood when it comes to use of libraries. Foster an adolescent appreciation for literature, reading and of course the dewy decimal. Apparently books written to target the middle school years was a virtually untapped market until Harry Potter arrived on the scene. Stephanie Meyer would soon follow suit and create the vampire romance series Twilight. Sophie is convinced that H.P. and Twilight are solid lit. I kind of think they are just one of a kind. If your the first then you set the bar good or bad you mark the measure. Like John Lennon would sing "No one is with me in my tree. That means it must be high or low."

Not too fond of wizards and booger flavored jelly beans, and with the enormous buzz Edward Cullen was getting as the standard by which all the women in my Relationships course were measuring their boy toys by I opted for Twilight. Its important to make sure that entertainment is filtered with the youth. Who can really live up to an immortal being with decades of schooling and wisdom encapsulate in fair skin, golden eyes, wavy dark hair and a porcelain six pack. Not to mention the ability to sprint to Canada and back in a few hours, and to read minds is a tad unrealistic.

After dragging through the first novel I quickly became immersed in the rest once the character Jacob became a central figure. Jacob the good natured protective type stood in contrast to the perfect Cullen, and tried his damnedest to win the damsels affections, but she consistently chooses the vampire crushing my underdogs heart. Jake eventually settles for being her best friend.

I couldn't help but feel that the main character was a bit selfish to consistently cause her Buddie so much pain. I never actually liked her she kind of came off as a self loathing, self absorbed, snotty, manipulative, boar actually. You know the type sassy, wishy washie, inconsistent, demanding of their way until you give in, and then they back peddle. Obnoxious really. It would have been far more interesting if both men had dumped her.

The finale was kind of disappointing as well. I mean come on Meyer even Rowlings killed off at least one central character. Grow a set.

The sad reality about Bella is that middle school aged women identify with her. Much like Jane in Watchmen she is by no special talent of her own desirable, but because of some genetic factor or force she has no control of or over able to earn the attention / affection of her love interest. It is problematic to lead young women to believe that, and much of this self depreciation I feel is addressed in the book Reviving Ophelia. I can not suggest enough that any person raising a daughter read and apply the principals presented in that book. Or even teachers or any individual who connects with and influences adolescent girls.

Then perhaps authors will begin to write female leads worth identifying with. Individuals that dare I suggest even a fella might say dam why can't I just be a bit more like Wonder Woman. :)

Parachute

2009-06-29T21:49:00.000-07:00

Bono once described the Holy Spirit in an interview to be like a woman, because she is inconsistent. Thus the inspiration for the song Mysterious Ways.

1 John 4:16 "God is LOVE! Whoever lives in LOVE lives in God and God in him."

I just think love is messy, and I'm not afraid to get my hands filthy.

With Kel M.I.A. this week in Juarez doing missions, I went looking through the Mexico trip from '06 to feel closer to him in his absence. I set the pics to a song that reminds me of the Holy Spirit.

I've also been keeping tabs on the Twins. Anyone else think we need to trade Baker? lol :) Please be praying for Kel and the youth group.

Cash Connection

2009-06-29T09:12:00.000-07:00

The Downer was recently showing a flick called "The Girlfriend Experience." It was about this upscale hooker who was paid by men not only for sexual favors, but also to text them cute messages, pick up their dry cleaning, cook their meals, talk about their favorite sports team, essentially simulate for one week all the perks of having a girlfriend minus the headache of fighting or reciprocation of care / companionship because the rate of exchange in this circumstance was of course cash.
Lots of people find the idea so Novel (Big Eye Roll lol :) when in reality Asian cultures have been doing this forever with their Geisha only the Geisha gets married off to their big spenders. Or arranged marriages were again its clear the couple are pairing up to start a family, or sustain one another financially as well as provide some measure of companionship. No emotions just business.
Some people think its cheap to ascribe a monetary value to companionship / any expression of love. Others think ascribing a monetary value clarifies the situation the expectations, and dollars actually validate. Because well we all know how we treat free items...we take them for granted. :) One could argue either side really. But I'm kind of excited to generate the discussion in my dating and relationships course next fall.

At Odds?

2009-06-26T14:37:00.000-07:00

"The art of writing is the highest of those permitted to man." Emerson

I snagged this quote out of The Wordy Shipmates by Sarah Vowell to close a point about the Puritans establishing Harvard, and yet people still maintain that religion and education are at odds.

Narative

2009-06-23T07:30:00.000-07:00

Tracy Chapman has a song that begins:

There is fiction in the space between

The lines on your page of memories

Write it down but it doesn't mean

You're not just telling stories

There is fiction in the space between

When critics started trying to claim that the accounts of the gospel contradicted one another. The logical response to the criticism was to look at court testimonies, how historical records are deemed as credible, and narratives. To measure these concrete devices for deriving accurate and reliable information, and essentially come to the conclusion that the gospels are different men's accounts of their time and interactions with Christ.

In our quest to derive pure measures of truth some people bought into the notion of relativism. That in all we can hope to understand of the situation and circumstances around us is our very own interpretation of those events. In a way separating us for a larger connective context. Essentially I can not hope to understand how anyone else might perceive or interpret a situation, a poem, a song, a visual image, piece of cake, ect. because I don't have the same biology, past experiences, age, gender, or virtually anything exactly the same as anyone else. Kind of isolating if you really buy into it. Relativism of course has some merit, but is not entirely accurate either.

This separation anxiety and isolating philosophy gave birth to the importance of narrative. Each individual is the main character of their own little reality, and each story is valid in and of itself because it is uniquely told by the only one who can lend itself any sort of legitimacy the person them self.

It is in my opinion why a show such as The Hills can become so outrageously popular. Its not that Laura Conrad herself is so riveting, or her story so engrossing. Its just that a bunch of cameras following around a person easy on the eyes unveiling her mundane intimacies for public display. Visibly displaying one of the central tenants of relativistic thought. Even if we are not Laura Conrad we all kind of feel like her when faced with postmodern relativism driving the cultural shift in popular thought and the way the world view is currently being interpreted from the lens of narrative. Everyones narrative is fascinatingly interesting (even if the cameras only display parts of the story) because it is uniquely theirs.

David Lynch has now also capitalized on this current world view, and done Interview Project. If my friend Hannah still reads this blog she just rolled her eyes, because she knows that I'm a total Lynch fiend. I want to put the disclaimer out there that I did go into viewing I.P. with every measure of resistance I'm capable of. To no avail though, as essentially David with his messy grey and white flock of seagull hair still managed to reel me in. My favorite Interviews to date are Tommy Holiday and Clara. Tommy living for love, and Clara's active resistance to leaving a legacy stating "Life is for the living. I don't need to be remembered."

If you check it out. Let me know what you think. No matter how hard one might try to avoid being saturated by ones culture its kind of inevitable. So here is a project and an aspect of narrative that I think is worth being saturated by. Enjoy!

The Best Days!

2009-06-19T08:00:00.000-07:00

Summer OFFICIALLY started for me this past Monday, and here are some of the highlights of thus far.

Kel in his gear for Mexico. The goal is to keep as much of his fair skin covered, so he doesn't come back with melanoma. Under his cap is a bandanna wrapped like the women on the front of Aunt Jamima Syrup. Fantastic!

This ensemble is for no particular reason, but who else can pull off a cow tee. lol :)

Yesterday I was woken up by Faith singing made up songs to Audrey, as she wheeled her into our room. Then she started swinging the chair in circles telling me to watch how much she likes it all the while Audrey had her arms raised like she was on a roller coaster giving a double thumbs up. :)

Audrey asked for pancakes for dinner Wednesday!

I proudly display the LARGEST pancake I have ever griddled.

The Escape Artist

2009-06-16T14:07:00.000-07:00

PLEASE FORGIVE MY GROSS NEGLIGENCE!!

A scholar once pondered "If a tree falls in the middle of a forest, and there is no one around to bear witness. Does it really make a sound?"

During the course of my studies at the U of M. I took a course entitled the physics and biology of sound. Sound essential is a wave that passes through and is carried upon air particles. Irregardless of a recipient or a receptor for these waves the physical resonating and displacement of air particles occurs. So in essence YES the fallen tree makes an undeniable CRASH!!

This notion brings me comfort as I take up blogging again. Its not so much that I wont miss readers and comments, but there is a kind of purity in just putting up posts for the sake of just publishing. An attitude of Audience welcome, but not necessary. All that said I've been dying to express some ideas I've had brewing for months now about a film called "Into the Wild."

I wrote this my friend about the flick, but the trailer is worth the 2:25 seconds to gain a better understanding of my synopsis.

J. ~

So Kel and I started the film at like 3, and then had to stop it to get the kids from daycare. I have to admit it was really difficult to tear myself away. I loved all the flash backs and forwards it really helped the story come to a suspenseful climax.
I could resonate with Chris's desire to escape the life mapped out for him. To break free of all the conventions our American culture has deemed as measures of success. To meet people and share in their kindness and reciprocate. To reinvent oneself. The name Alexander Supertramp was a good choice. Alexander a great conqueror, and then Supertramp to indicate a conqueror of nothing because to be an excellent tramp is really just to survive and move around a whole bunch. Just scraping by.
As a female his quest would be far to dangerous to attempt. I mean I would essentially have gotten myself probably raped or killed, so that removed me from truly feeling like I could reside in Christopher's shoes.
I was kind of torn up by how much families can mess with a person. You don't get to pick your folks, and it seemed like his tragic end all could have been avoided if his parents had just channeled his Spirit a bit better. Or put more stock in real genuine happiness rather than all the effort it takes to put on the facade of happiness / having it together. Probably the same amount of energy exertion for either path, so its heart wrenching the consequences of choosing to maintain a lie. Pride coupled with vanity a lethal combination it seems. And all the ways Chris behaved to get his B.A. he learned probably inadvertently from his parents behavior and the way they lived their lives. How they didn't see it coming.
I loved his final conclusion or "Life Thesis" I like to think of it as. "Happiness is more gratifying when shared with others." Its true. :) So you want to play guitar hero real soon? lol :)

Alexander Supertramp's story reminded me of "Candy Girl a Year in the Life of an Unlikely Stripper" in a way. Diablo Cody essentially states right in black in white that she had an aspiring day job where she was getting promoted, and recognition for her talents, but opted to escape this environment for g-strings, dim lighting, poles, platforms, and damp dollar bills. Inventing her own "Super-tramp."

Boldly going where no woman she had know to go before, tasting the freedom of nudity, and harnessing the power of sex appeal. Essentially she hits rock bottom as well in a tyred of tears recognizing, what Megan Fox has yet to realize, that she deserved more than a lively hood dictated by the appetites of men. Her Life Thesis: "I deserved better presentation."

Christopher and Jennifer both intelligent, well educated, talented individuals both found themselves desperate to escape the direction their lives were headed. Opting for dangerous life threatening alternatives, both physically, as well as the death of ones credibility. What cried out inside them, and produced the life altering responses that resulted? I can't hear it, but then again I couldn't hear a tree crashing miles away either. But I can resonate for sure.

Lucky Tee

2009-06-16T07:58:00.000-07:00

Holding quite a record. I may just have found my calling.

But it wasn't a lucky day for Aunt Tee!

Over the Top

2009-05-04T16:45:00.000-07:00

Sly made a film in 1987 about the complex art of arm wrestling.

The Marschel 2009 re-make

Easter Service Drama

2009-04-13T11:36:00.000-07:00

P.T. approached me a few weeks ago and asked if I would head up the Easter Service drama. The idea was to have members of our church family kind of put a face to a struggle. Because as many believers understand that even with devout faith we still face all the same trials, and Christ is our all in all. Not just in these matters, but in all facets of our lives.

I decided to put each person in a dark colored hoodie, and write a struggle across the back, and then have the hoodies removed and laid at the foot of the cross. I kind of symbolic action of where we cast our cares. Each person was then turned towards the front and had new words that revealed the way in which Christ provided deliverance. Each person was then asked to read a kind of anthem verse. One that encourages them with this struggle.

I really liked the idea because it is a common misconception that once you become a Christian you life is then supposed to be carefree. When in reality not a whole lot changes on that front. Its how you deal with the problems and pains that come your way.

I am so very thankful for my brothers and sisters who participated in this, and for their boldness to protray the gritty, messy, beautitful reality of Faith.

Gift Lable

2009-03-29T09:02:00.000-07:00

My first year teaching a co-worker in my department used to bring me lunch from time to time. A lot of the time I would take the containers wash them, and then re-fill them with her favorite food or some other little treat. It was delightful being blessed by her friendship, and then showing my appreciation.
At the beginning of this year I used the overhead projector cart. I went to return it exactly how it had been given to me, but once again saved by a considerate co-worker she helped me wind all the cords and tidy the cart. In essence returning the item in better condition that I got it.
I guess it doesn't really come very natural to people to do this. A lot of times my students will readily tattle on the hour before them for leaving dishes in the sink, putting things back in the wrong spot, or away still dripping wet. But I have yet to see students in their down time before brownies finish up go through and make sure things in the kitchen are as perfect as possible. Motivated by their own volition.
This is a transferable concept. On a marcoscale even. People are apt to complain about the destruction done to the environment, or the crime rate, the economy, or any social ill. But they are not invested enough to use their time, abilities, skills, and talents to their fullest measure to do much more than get worked up and clamor about the ordeal, or shift the responsibility to another lap.
Sometimes I imagine earth from the vantage point of Mars with a giant red ribbon wrapped around it like a gift, and under my name on the tag a small line of instructions below reading :
"Consideration Welcome! Please leave things in better condition than you found them."

Enjoy,
Earth

The Bromance

2009-03-22T16:50:00.001-07:00

I decided this year to actively try to make decent picks for March Madness. I was tied for first with my Dad until Marquette blew it for me to today. Memphis I know your reading you better send those Missouri boys back into the mountains doing what they do best feeding rusty cans to goats.
So I tried to engage some of my male colleges in friendly smack talk, and so far its been kind of a let down. I think a lot of gents take it for granted that they can pretty much walk up to any other genetic XY and engage in some type of moderate chit chat about coaches, players, and shots. While the circles I travel in on the whole the ladies God Blessum are perfectly content to stay completely oblivious to the Madness that surrounds March.
The other day Kel was participating in a fantasy baseball draft with his buddy, and I made a comment about some Southern state courting Tubby. Instead of addressing me I watched them look at one another and toss around the possibilities, and the reprocutions. :( Bromances. Sheesh
In other Bromance news I've been privilege lately to quite a few of them. At different stages as well. The blossoming stage into the solidified full blown bromance. Fascinating really. They take on one another mannerisms, inside jokes, share initial joys, frustrations, its all very grounded in Socrates ideas of males being a Superior companion to a man than a female.
If given the chance to do it all over again I would have to agree with Shash Fierce in that I think even as a woman I could a lot of times be a better man than a good majority of the lot and fully embrace my set of XX's. However I have to admit participating in March Madness could make a pretty strong case for Freud on that envy issue. Well if the stars choose to allow my kindred spirit in the work place Susan and I to cross paths I know my March Madness Goddess is out there, and we will meet when we are meant to.

Watchmen Analysis

2009-03-07T11:32:00.000-08:00

Warning Details of the Film will be revealed.

So I pretty much had to go and see the Watchmen Friday seeing as we only had a half day and it was the Open Date. It was like my destiny really.

I have yet to read the graphic novel series, and was excited to have my first exposure via live action film. It is how Frank Miller and I got introduced and naturally thus was the beginning of a riveting thought provoking literary experience. The two things I had gathered from all the hype was that it was risky to make as the serious was edgy the line between hero and villain a complete blur, and that if it did well this could be perceived as a new legitimacy for the graphic novel. Watchmen could be kind of like "the Indie" version of graphic novels as it deviates from script by being more messy tackling human conditions that are difficult to filter into right and wrong.

The plot really explores ideals surrounding hero worship the pressure of the pedestal, the lengths and cost of peaceful co-existence, and those lines we all face where our talents can be used for great goodness or wickedness.

I think since the people invested in this kind of figured they only had one shot. So if they did not tell the entire story the series may just be longer than my own 30 years of life. The film is 2 hours and 45 min long. Audiences will witness two generations of Super Hero's, the way their lives intertwine, and how the cultural circumstances have lead to this pivotal point where relationships have been strained both inside the group of crime fighters as well as between countries leaving our nation under the threat of nuclear war with the U.S.S.R.

There are so many satires and allegories in the film that its pretty much genius. Since I did not read the series I had no idea the Comedian is ironically humorous because he has zero sense of humor and just laughs at the circumstances around him to deal with the hideous killing machine he is becoming at the hands of violence he participates in for the sake of peace. His condition is so bad in fact he can not even function under peaceful circumstances, and is indicated as one of the shooters in the Kennedy assassination which any historian worth his weight would agree dragged things out for the Vietnam war.

Dr. Manhattan is a representation of God a supreme being who has very little qualms with killing in that he doesn't see death as an ending, but a mere matter of energy changing form. His answers and speech are both truthful, and ambiguous limited by the humans inability to see and experience the world the way he does. He does his best to be an instrument of goodness, but essentially everyone is just trying to manipulate his capabilities for their own gain and to satiate their limited vision of the Universe.

The Sociopath whose deep throat voice given that the time frame is to be during the Nixon era should have tipped me off that he would be a vigilantly for truth at all costs, a rigid persona who sees the world as very black and white quick to judge and unleash his wrath on those who cross his lines of righteousness. Despite his death he is the one who in the end writes and surrenders the truth to the public at large achieving his goal despite all barriers.

Dan is our perfect gentleman. So gentle in fact he is willing to suppress his own natural tendencies and crime fighting desires for the sake of others. Squeaky clean, and a tad flaccid of a character.

The Pacifist a brilliant and powerful crime fighter turned toy maker. Devises a plan to cure humanity at least for a time of its war lust using their very own nature to his advantage. He isn't corrupted by his capabilities or his power more a slave to pacifism. But is essentially the villain of our tale despite his accomplishment of peace.

Lori sucks. She is infantile, child like, always fights behind some man, whinny about the lack of attention she is getting, and runs from one bed to another not in any kind vixen sort of way, but perhaps to flash a little skin on the screen. Nothing that she has any kind of control over, but just her mere conception plays a pivotal plot point. If I had any silly notions that this series were not written by a male Lori certainly confirms that as he clearly does not know how to create or convey a strong empowered lady hero. It turns my stomach that all the female characters are kind of pathetic.

When a person decides to go see a movie they are participating in suspension of belief. We have to relinquish reality and the parameters of our true lives to engage the plots, characters, and imagery. At the end of 2 hours and 45 min leaving critical analysis and reality at the door it is very easy to get sucked into the Watchman philosophy that humanity is depraved, and needs depraved solutions or depraved hero's to cure our circumstance. That when one enemy has been laid to rest a new one arises to take its place. (journalistic savages lol that was for you Jende :)
But you have to be cautious of saturating yourself with large doses of a singular captivating perspective it can lead to tunnel vision, and you may miss a more accurate perception of reality when you begin to operate under those pretenses solely. If I had to sum up the film in one word it would be gritty. Oh and the violence is remarkably graphic. I don't think any one of these crime fighters knows how to punch with out producing a protruding bone and buckets of blood.

Beauty - Blessing or Curse

2009-03-02T09:35:00.000-08:00

Lizzie and I went out for Breakfast yesterday, and had an important conversations about beauty and attraction.
I told her that were most people at first glance would conclude that we are cute. Its really more our personalities that are magnetic.
Phoebe and I had a frank discussion once about jealousy, and how we are not very jealousy people. But if you have a lot of talents it makes it a whole lot easier just to celebrate what other have and have to offer. When you life matches the idea concept of many jealousy becomes a little less of a stumbling block.
Ani D. Franco sings "Everyone harbors a secret hatred for the pretties girl in the room." I understand what she means, but it does not resonate with my nature. Its actually really difficult for me not to see the good in others, or to concentrate on those things I find praise worthy and in so much as that I might dismiss other more important character flaws because my concentration is so much set on building others up and being encouraging.
So I have this stunning friend. And it kind of dawned on me this weekend that most fellas unless they are her blood relatives probably are highly attracted to her, and really would only like to win her heart clouding the intentions of the relationship.
I think it would kind of suck to have that kind of road block to male pals. Attraction kind of always getting in the way. I'm not sure what I would do without some of my close guy buddies.

"Cause I owe my life to the people that I love." Ani D.

An Eighth Deadly Sin

2009-02-24T18:23:00.000-08:00

On Monday we had a teacher in-service. Initially everyone kind of thinks these types of days are nice and low key. Students are off for the day, and you fill their seats gaining ideas on how to improve learning and achievement.
In college I had this amazing musician friend, with perfectly sculpted dreadlocks maintained by the hair police, an upbringing chalked full of enough emotional turmoil for two life times of lyrical fodder, and a deep love and appreciation for Mathematics. Told me once that Math was the language of the Universe. Its spoken everywhere and understood by all.
My friend started a band called Pilot to Co-pilot that started to gain popularity. This was just one of many bands, and like the rest ended in a separation due to creative differences. Of all his attempts at getting a band together I though P. to Co-P. had the best shot at success. Its kind of my theory that my friend would sabotage these bands, because it was easier to fail than to have your dreams realized. My friend in order to compensate for his chaotic upbringing was a perfectionist, and would micro-manage his circumstances and that which he could not achieve perfectly (a.k.a. a group of artists trying to be collaborative lol :) would agitatedly as well as prematurely toss in the towel.
I would like to hear how my friend is doing. Did he retreat to the perfect world of integers and parallelograms? Did he achieve his pure animal free living arrangements? Has he gotten a band together?
My current school is pretty incredible. Not only is the very building itself structurally gorgeous the pool of educators is so rich with talent it is difficult to stand out amongst a star studded cast. It was presented to our staff that education has made a pendulum shift in thought. Instead of focusing on practices we will be focusing on the outcomes. Did our efforts lead to comprehensive results. Can you prove in a data driven assessment that the students internalized and mastered the content you set out to impart on them. Results focused.
It is good in that if our efforts did not lead to student success then they were essentially worthless anyways. I will admit I was overwhelmed. I am at a school that is absolutely capable of achievement, and being a role model for the entire state. It is so close to this stunning accomplishment its almost frightening to care. I know we can do it, and if we don't count that amongst the seven deadly sins. It might be messy, we might face set backs, but if your not leading then your just the follower or worse dead weight.

New Years Smart Goals

2009-02-16T11:41:00.000-08:00

Kel tackles a Filipino porridge!

Julia Kel

Novel

2009-02-12T18:44:00.000-08:00

I really want to apologize for being so neglectful about my blog. Time just really seems to get away from me these day, but I look forward to this summer when I will have more reflective time. I'm sure to be back up and posting 3 to 4 times a week then.
To bring everyone up to speed. I am absolutely adoring Lost, and have yet to see Jake G.'s prophesy come to fruition and disappointment result in my following of the series. Thus logic would conclude that Jake is both in error about Ringo Star as well as popular television shows.
I wanted to take a quick moment to speak about Lady GaGa the newest pop kitten.
She is a 22 year old, and I think that will help her navigate the attention better than some of her younger predecessors. Also the fact that she has written songs for Britney Spears gives her a privileged behind the scenes glance at the inner workings of the pop princess machine. And yet still everyone thinks her blase' attitude about the art she's producing is fresh, and thus earned her some attention.
She likens herself to Andy Warhol or at least someone did, and she likes the comparison. I read an article once about how Andy Warhol wanted to destroy art. Wanted his printing factory's to mass produce his work and take inspiration out of the picture. I had no idea that was his intentions, and because he was the first to try and murder art he was hailed as this eccentric genius, because the appreciation of the creative expression is so ingrained in our D.N.A. that he almost could have been an alien to achieve such a counter cultural idea. Sometimes Novelty is over rated.

Would this Fly?

2009-01-29T15:20:00.000-08:00

Kelly asked Audrey tonight if she would help him and Faith clean up the toy room.

Audrey said "No! I'm going to play"

I wonder if that would work with at school.

Ms. Marschel would you ________ (fill in the blank)________?

Me "No. I think I'd like to just _______(fill in the blank :) ______."

Feel free to fill in the blanks.

Inauguration Momentum

2009-01-24T09:32:00.000-08:00

I feel kind of irresponsible for having missed putting up something about the Inauguration. I'm sure there are plenty of other blogs, myspaces, facebooks, and the like that have shared ideas and sentiments, but I believe in ripple effect. If you have something positive to put out there I'm a totally fan. God certainly doesn't care about time frames or deadlines when it comes to goodness.

It all began last Saturday with Faith's dance class. Kel signed Faith up for a dance class without really consulting me before hand. Then he just kind of expected that I would know where to find a leotard, ballet slippers, and tights in the middle of sub zero temperatures, and that I would pretty much be the one responsible for getting her to and from the Y. All in all I'm glad for Faith's opportunity, Kel's initiative to support our children in their aptitudes and interests, and look forward to being a more integral part of these decisions in the future.

While Faith practiced plie' and somersaults I dialed my friend Jende as my skin turned four shades of green that he was close enough to be counted among the numbers in history books as one to bear witness to the transfer of power. As well as find out if He'd be taking a seat in Obama's cabinet. :)

I got the inside scoop on the accommodations Washington had made to make way for the sheer volumes of people expected to show. Jende would be spending the night in his office just so he watch via Jumbo Tron not even entertaining a delusional hope of catching the limo line. And yet I still turned a shade deeper green.

Fast Forward to Tuesday, and every television screen in the building was broadcasting C.N.N. moment to moment coverage of the Inauguration. I felt the goose bumps rise on my arms despite a room full of 365 degree oven's and red hot coiled stove top ranges.

I resonated with the sense of hope, and accomplishment that seemed to fill every room over this Presidential Victory. I was fortunate enough to have the chance to watch with Susie during the start of our lunch minus the opportunity for ignorance to make any rude interruptions. There would be no rain on this parade today.

Naively I'm sure but afterwards I felt poised and ready to roll up my selves and participate in the hard work that is in store, and hopeful that others put forth their best as well.

I actually kind of can't wait.

Communion and Offering

2009-01-11T18:50:00.000-08:00

Communion Meditation

Girls Gone Wild Segment

Offering Meditation

Ode To Kel

2009-01-04T17:47:00.000-08:00

Dear Kelly ~

While traveling the volital fair grounds set aside for the last 4 days as a homing beacon to Bridzillas across the state of Wisconsin. (a.k.a. "The Bridal Show.";) Imagine if you will vendor after vendor peddling satin dreams and pearl promises of marital bliss all wrapped up in a single day. Commercialization puke! I was more thank thankful to be past that phase of my life.

I mentally went through my list of all the ways we could have met: The Lake, Carthage, Wheaton College, and then finally how we did cross paths. All the while cake after cake sample shoved into my hand or towards my mouth. The feeling worse than the threat of getting it smeared on my face the day we sliced one another a piece.

I thought about your Seattle summer project, and how roughly 30 people went all women save one Kelly Marschel. Mostly single Christian girls looking to serve God and hoping to find Mr. Right in the process. And yet you still managed to escape cupids arrow. As dj's competed with instrumental quartets for each Brides musical fancy. The equivalent to being trapped in a guitar hero nightmare.

As I perused card stock for save the date magnets, and embossed silver invites. I recalled your reputation as the Crusade "Player" breaking hearts left and right, as well as a heart ache or two for you. Those girls whose foolishness to cast you aside was to my complete gain. I should send them embossed cards of appreciation. lol :)

I honestly believe that Chris Martin wrote this song for you.

Love Always,

Mish

Smart Goals

2009-01-03T11:39:00.000-08:00

Smart Goals are ones that are characterized as stretching, short term, and achievable. The are a staff development tool used to help educators organize and assess their contributions either personally or to the school community as a whole. Smart Goals help teachers achieve and perfect practices rather than just stay in a constant mode of development.

I had never heard of Smart Goals until I started teaching out at Wilmot, but I've been practicing smart goals my whole life with my new years resolutions. Last year if you recall I resolved the following things in this post.

This year my Resolutions are:

1. Cut back on my coffee consumption. I'd like to get it back down to 16 oz a day 8 in the a.m. and 8 in the mid afternoon.

2. Keep up with our family lake nights once track kicks up. Last year at the first signs of spring we would spend Monday night down by the lake having dinner and playing with the kids. Every Monday would be unrealistic this year, but twice a month should be easy to swing.

3. View every film Edward Nortin had a role in.

Anyone else make Smart Goals for 2009, and would care to share I'd love to hear them. Should any of you find yourself desperately seeking Nortin thespian accomplishments let me know and we can help one another achieve. Can I get a "Yes We Can!!"

Well gotta run and fill my que. lol :)

Happy New Year.

The Most Amazing...

2008-12-28T20:07:00.000-08:00

At bed time tonight Audrey asked to pray. She said "God thank you for me, Daddy, Faithie, Matt, Aunt Tee, Papa, Grandma, and her teachers." (in that order :) Then she said it was my turn. I kind of get goosebumps just remembering it.

At the begining of the summer we were praying just before getting on I94 for a long road trip, and she put her hands over her ears and repeated "Shut up....shut up....SHUT UP!!" over and over and louder and louder each time. It was kind of one of those funny and disturbing moments all rolled into one.

I have about as much control over Audrey becoming a Christian as I do over tomorrows weather forcast. But I sure am thankful to heard just about one of the most amazing prayers I've ever listened to in my life tonight.

So much for the second born being treated like a second class citizen. Here is a post just for my little Paush-tree.

Head of the Class

2008-12-21T15:01:00.000-08:00

To simulate a Bridal Shower in class Tiff came in and shared her engagement story. I think I just heard Aunt Annie laugh and clap. lol :)

Enjoy!

Kristal's Very Good Question.

2008-12-07T12:27:00.000-08:00

This is going to sound completely backwards coming from the hopeless romantic, but ultimately the very logical side of me understands that life is very invested in perpetuating itself. All organic matter find means to continue. To leave behind a type of legacy that either resembles, remembers, or replicates the origins existence. I ultimately believe that it is because God is eternal everything else in creation has this obsession with the eternal. Mimicking or modeling our origin.
Less complex organic material or life need only to divide in order to generate a legacy. More complex organic material such as humans need more coxing or convincing. We romanticize our primal urge to mate and create legacies with notions of love at first sight or soul mates. But ultimately these are only ideals that help us fall into productive patterns of mating and procreating. Human beings unlike other species can only produce a limited number of spawn if at all. I have never even heard of an other species that are barren, or incapable of division.
Most female humans enter into a state of pregnancy without ever considering all of the repercussions of that decision. If women knew all the bodily changes, the hormonal changes, and the realistic life long commitment to child rearing and raising I'd be curious to see how many would still go through with it.
Love at first sight is in all honestly just a way to justify and persuade humans to willingly participate in leaving a legacy. Please don't misunderstand me I enjoy love, romance, being a wife, and mother more than most. I believe in marriage, families, and having children. But I do not discredit the fact that underneath it all is just reproduction. That humans make the bigger deal because we need it to engage in the process at all, and because we are constantly striving to and crying out for God and to be like God. I fear for those who romanticize love, marriage, and child rearing as a means for life fulfillment, because they will always be discontent. Romance is a very effective detractor for our true needs and purpose which can only be fulfilled or exists with God.

Does that make sense?

P.S. Congrats Vicky on your Sis's engagement.

Pair Bonds

2008-12-02T18:08:00.000-08:00

In my excitement to announce my sisters engagement I didn't realize that I just granted access to my blog to an array of co-workers. So I thought I'd better put something intelligent up quick before they get the sense that all I do is attend or throw theme parties.
I teach a course on dating, romance, love, marriage, and attraction. When a person first encounters someone they find visually appealing immediately their pupils dilate. In a way they expand their vision to take in more of what they like. If the objectified person responds in an affirming way then a chemical release occurs in the brain that triggers the synapses in the brain to fire in a pattern similar to that of a person on large amounts of heroin. The brain continues to trigger in this fashion for the next 9-12 months in both individuals.
Many engagements take place after the first 6 months to a year of consistent exclusive dating at which point the couple has made a major life decision on the same brain patterns and chemicals as one on heavy narcotics. This chemical effect is called the pair bond. Its the bodies natural way of formulating an addiction to their life partner.
And that is why break ups can be so physically and emotionally difficult on people, because their systems are going through all the processes similar to that of withdrawal.
I like the term pair bond. Initially it sound like the delicious grainy fruit. But the idea that we formulate chemical bonds to those that we love is kind of romantic, something deeper than fleeting words and inconsistent emotions. Something physical to carry you through trails, rocky patches, and an ally to aid one in loving a person just the way they are.

Its both natural and divine.

My Little Sister

2008-11-30T05:57:00.000-08:00

Last night under the ruse that Kelly and my Dad had planed a date night for the four of us we went out to dinner at The Safe House, and latter to the dueling piano pub Lucille's. Upon arriving at the a table at the back had Matt's immediate family. As the realization sunk in that we were all there to celebrate the engagement of my little sister my face froze with tears. The only other time in my life when I'd been moved so quickly to tears was

1. When I got engaged.

2. When I saw the preview for the movie Radio.

I have not been given permission to share the details yet, so the pics will have to do for now.

The Future In-Laws

Future Brother and Sister In-Law

The Arrival of the E'fianced.

Initial Congratulations

Video of Who Knew!

Bride to be with Maid of Honor

The Stemware

Tried to get a close up of that bling, but the camera couldn't handle all the light reflection.

A little Bob for the occasion.

Harry Potter Party

2008-11-16T07:21:00.000-08:00

It seems to me that my friend Kris and I have this affinity for theme parties. Just after Halloween he had a Harry Potter Party, and in all honesty I have only seen the very first film at my sleepover bachelorette party. Although it was purposefully timed just after Halloween just to catch all the costume sales it was still very difficult without a proper background knowledge of the stories to scrounge up costumes.

J.K. Rowlings stopped in.

No place I'd rather be than under Pud's pit. Right Kel?

Singer Song writer, and novice toker of the Sheesha.

Experienced Sheesha toker

Yes that is their real hair. I asked.

No he hasn't been bludgeoned in the head. Just tried a snot flavored Jelly Belly

Divinely Orchestrated

2008-11-13T10:25:00.000-08:00

I've been having these really exciting conversations with my friend Ashley. It was really funny, but I was at the church making the prayer stations for Mexico, and she just walked in and met me very first. Sometimes I think we call things funny when we want to down play the spiritual side of a situation. Like God can't orchestrate two individuals meeting for important purposes or something. Or if we were maybe its just if we admit that we think these appointments divine then it makes God a little too personally invested in us.
If we precieve the circumstance as divine intervention or divinely orchestrated then it might suggest a specific level of self importance that the world is constantly charging the church with. I don't think divine appointments are church specific per say, but somethings just seem too coincidental to be coinsidence.
At any rate I digress. Ashley and I had Minnesota in common, and that would be the first of many similarities. I am exceedingly greatful for her, because its been a while since I've had some iron with which to really sharpen upon. Not that I haven't come across some wicked smart people with important ideas and challenges to church, but its always hindered in a way by the politics, politness, or divergance in ideas.
She has this kind of idea about being a "Monk Among Men."
I think I write less on the blog lately because I've lacked inspiration, direction, and drive. But she and I are going for coffee and to have one of our crucial conversations. But unlike some of the past times together I think some mode of action may result. Enough dialouge. But I'd hate to put that kind of pressure on things. So just kind of welcome the chance to take in something warm physically, and spend time together.

Election '08

2008-11-06T17:04:00.000-08:00

The Marschel tradition established in 2004 carried on this past Tuesday as we celebrated voting with our "Hit the Polls Party '08." The Milwaukee Journal wrote this article declaring the Wisconsin had the second highest voter turn out in the nation. Way to go Wisconsin!! Those Packer flags that hang large and above your American flags are not an indication of your patriotism in the slightest. You had me fooled.

Incriminating. Forgive us in advance should any amount of stumbling take place due to our beverage endorsement. Curse you Rachel Ray and your voting party issue of Everyday.

The McCain / Wirch camp.

The Bipartisan furniture piece.

The Red...White... & Blue spread.

A warm greeting at the door.

Frauding Slip ;)

Art + Redstripe = One Happy Constituent.

Beverage Free. Can you see their halo's???

Who am I?

My little Patriot. Faith told me she was going to stay up all night Tuesday. Elections just do that to her.

No you can't have all of Obama darling. He is for everyone.

A good time was had by all, so make sure to be in our neck of the woods 2012. Long Live Democracy.

Ten Years and Counting!

2008-11-02T06:45:00.000-08:00

On Thursday Kel went camping with his good Buddy and comrade Mark (a.k.a. Chief). Suddenly every familiar sound translates into that psycho path who just happened to be in the neighborhood, and choose your home out of the 100's of residents to terrorize. Stinking competent furnace. Not to mention that its the night before Halloween, and every other television commercial is for the opening of some horror flick. I've seen enough computer enhanced demonic faces for one life time. Needless to say I got roughly 1.5 hours of sleep that night.

But as is my tendency to place a silver lining around just about anything, I caught this exceptional artistic display of the gorgeous Adele.

I can not wait to use this in my Relationships course as we continue to look at mate selection and how the existence of attraction does not a couple make.

However the song resonates with me on a different plane. I had a seriously frustrating interaction about two weeks ago. And its uncanny that Vickie would post a comment about sharing the same spiritual Birth in Christ time frame in relation to what went down.

I have been a Christian for 10 YEARS!!! TEN WHOLE YEARS. When one looks at the scope of their life a rare few can recall their first memory via the age of 3. Most 5-6, and at that point it is a day or two here or there occasionally something may trigger a recall, but its fairly safe to say that the first 5-7 years are virtually a blur. That is not to suggest that significant personality development, brain development, and emotional impacts are not occurring. These impacts are just difficult to recall, but are evidenced in our abilities, skills, and behaviors for the rest of our lives.

I have not been a mother for TEN years.

I have not been a wife for TEN years.

I was not an adolescent for TEN year.

I have not been a teacher for TEN years.

I have not even been in my 20's for TEN years yet.

I have not been a voter for TEN years.

Any other facet or my existence chosen or happenstance does not compete with my faith life. I made the decision consciously as an adult. But people tend to treat me like any doctrinal sides of the fence I fall upon have come via flower petal.

Women should be in leadership.....They should not.....Should lead....Should not.......They Should!

I have prayed, read the word, studied, interviewed, and listened to God on matters as much as any other. And I do not disregard others wrestling either. Can't we just give one another the same regard. You know a little 1 Tim. 4:12 action. Can I get a Hollar back.

Sing the conflicts of my heart Adele....Sing it.

Butterflys and Ballots

2008-10-26T15:28:00.001-07:00

When I was in college my foreign language was American Sign Language. Sign has actually many different cultural dialects, but could almost be like math and considered a Universal communicative device.

I remember the professor telling us about how Sign had changed. In the past there was a specific sign for butter and than a specific sign for fly.

And small children would often get confused when people were talking about the Monarch or other beautiful winged creatures as the signs utilized would conjure images of yellow colored churned milk being thrown out a window or launched through the air.

Since then the sign has actually changed to interlocking thumbs and fingers sprayed moving in a winged flight like pattern. A more recognizable symbol for the insect.

I remember the first time my friend Gabe said the words church state separation to me.

Much like the A.S.L. children I imagined the chairs of the senate empty and the air still and dead. Not a human in sight. It was always my understanding since the onset of my Christian walk that the Church is inside believers. It was never equated with a building in my head, so I did not understand what he meant.

How could government operate devoid of humans? lol

Talk about faith like a child.

B.B.B.

2008-10-23T18:53:00.000-07:00

At my b.b.b (Best Blogging Buddies) request I am posting about the close out of our season. I was defiantly planning on writing about this, but time did get away from me.

We had our final tournament last Thursday, and if a musical interlude could occur as my memory recalls the night of Volleyball glory the lyrics would certainly be....

Those were the best days of my life...those were the best days of myyyyy life.

Here is what I sent my friend last week about the evening:

Did you get my message!!! Oh my God....Oh MY GOD!! The team played incredible. Just on FIRE!! They moved to every ball, passed like pros, and were aggressive. They were NOT nice girls once. :) :) :)
We played 12 games 6 teams twice to 15 rally scoring. We were up against Central first, and if you don't know Central is out of control good. I mean never in my wildest dreams did I think we would dominate them. Especially in my very first year out here. But the talent was there and the Central coach was totally lousy to me in our first game. He told me when the score was 6 / 9 in their favor that we were only going to 15 to save time. That being our first game I just kind of said "Okay." But he WIAA says he needs to ask me that, and it should have been established before the start of the game. CHEATER. I was so gunning for him, and you should have seen his whole body language displayed the defeat. We ended up 8 and 4 overall. But I'm not sure what place we came in.
If nothing else goes well this entire year I couldn't even care. I'm so proud of my team.

Gotta run...I have to go do cart wheels down the hall way now. :)

I saw the principal first thing the next morning, and I told him all about it. He asked me if the Central coached cried. I love my principal. It just made the accomplishment all the more sweet.

I miss it. Now that its over, and I feel like I'm less productive. Part of me looks back and thinks its all very surreal. Like how in the world did I accomplish games, practices, a new position, ect. And it hits me like a spike to the face my husband is pretty much a God send. Thanks Kel for everything I couldn't have accomplished any of it without your encouragement and support.

Close Encounters

2008-10-20T15:24:00.000-07:00

Its that time of year again. Time again for my home to be filled with adolescent testosterone encountering Christ. Yes Bibles were studied, prayers spoken, meals shared, and Christ encountered.

Kelly was naturally double booked having been asked to give the offering and communion meditation this weekend. So to alleviate some of the demand I took over the meditation duty. Below is what I said for communion, and the other post is tithe. It was my third time, but it still feels like the first.

I’d like everyone to think for a moment about your favorite food. At school I teach the cooking classes, and food is the ultimate sensory experience. It stimulates our eyes, our nose, our touch, our taste, and even our hearing. It not only nourishes us it’s virtually impossible to ignore. When we are hungry it affects everything else we do.

In John 6: 41-58 the word says:
At this the Jews began to grumble about him because he said, “I am the bread that came down from heaven.” They said, “Is this not Jesus, the son of Joseph whose father and mother we know? How can he now say, “I came down from heaven?”

“Stop grumbling among your selves, “Jesus answered. “No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws him, and I will raise him up at the last day. It is written in the Prophets: They will all be taught by God. Everyone who listens to the Father except the one who is from God; only he has seen the Father. I tell you the truth he who believes has everlasting life. I am the bread of life. Your forefathers ate the manna in the desert, yet they died. But here is the bread that comes down from heaven which a man may eat and not die. I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever. This bread is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world.” Jesus said “I tell you the truth; unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood you have no life in you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day. For my flesh is real food and my blood is real drink. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in him. Just as the living Father sent me and I live because of the Father, so the one who feeds on me will live because of me. This is the bead that came down from heaven. Your forefathers ate manna and died, but he who feeds on this bread will live forever.

In Mathew 26: 26 – 29 The word says:
“While they were eating, Jesus took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to his disciples saying, “Take and eat this is my body.”

Then he took the cup gave thanks and offered it to them saying, “Drink from it, all of you. This is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins. I tell you, I will not drink of this fruit of the vine from now on until the day when I drink it anew with you in my Father’s kingdom.”

Jesus called Himself the bread of life, and on his last night commanded us to remember Him as the ultimate form of nourishment through the act of communion. At North Point we practice open communion. This means if you have professed Jesus as your Lord and Savior you are welcome to join with us as the cup and bread is passed. Please use this time to obey Christ and be nourished physically, and by His Spirit in your souls.

Please pray with me…Heavenly Father thank you for being the Bread of life. Please open our hearts and minds to your spirit and use this time of communion to speak your will and truth into our lives. Amen

Okay so it was over 3 min. But always room for improvement.

Mish the Thrid

2008-10-20T15:18:00.000-07:00

Tithe and Offering

In college I used to work in addition to my course load. At times I even had two jobs. Despite my work ethic I still managed to turn a $2.00 late into a $32.00 one after the bank would attach their over draft charges. Not often, but everyone in a while I still found myself calling home asking my folks for a little extra cushion to float me into my next pay period. The bank of Durso. It wasn’t that I had a problem earning money or that I had was an excessive spender I just had zero budgeting skills.

Which is strange coming from two parents who are arguably the best budgeters on the planet, I can remember countless occasions where my Dad would talk about putting together a budget. Or asking me if I had a budget.

Straight out of college I married Kelly, and one of our complementary qualities is that he was very good at managing finances. This was a huge relief to me, as I’d clearly never mastered the skill, and T.C.F. was loving life after finals and the espresso were 2-3 a night.

In Donadl Millers Book Blue like Jazz he tells the story of his friend Curt. This gentleman rarely stepped foot inside a church, but tithed religiously. His rational for this behavior was that “He was never going to steal from God” I remember thinking about this account last year when we went through a sermon series on finances in relationship to worship. And it struck me “God forbid anything should ever happen to Kelly, or I would have no idea how much to tithe.” I had no ownership or even knowledge of what went into the bank, or how things divided out.
It wasn’t that I have children, or that it’s responsible to know your finances that motivated me to invest in this. Or even my past experience with bank fees and overdrafts. It was truly that I want to honor God in every facet of my life that compelled me to finally begin learning about budgets. And apply what the word says in Prov. 17 :16 “Of what use is money in the hands of a fool since he has no desire to get wisdom?”

I don’t think anyone goes into a relationship with Christ intending to be a thief, but intentions are evidenced in our actions. So let’s take this time of offering to display our worship by giving out of the blessing Christ has richly provided to further advance His Kingdom. If this is your first time attending North Point please do not feel under any obligation to give, and consider this service as a chance to worship Christ and express your faith.

Emotionally Laden

2008-10-03T19:23:00.000-07:00

There is this charming little film called Simply Irresistible with Sara Michelle Gellar and Patrick Sean Flannery. In this film Gellar is an awful chef, until a twist of fate from a divine intervention suddenly transforms all her dishes into mouth watering delicacies. The catch however is that whatever she happens to be feeling at the time when she is creating the dish becomes the main ingredient and the dinnie experiences her emotions with every bite. She is entrancing people with her emotionally laden food especially after she falls hopelessly in love, and this delectable ingredient is as addictive as of the most enticing of deserts.
I showed clips of this film to my intro. foods students to explore the relationship between food and emotions. It occurred to me during this lesson that nothing else stimulates the human like food. By this I mean that it stimulates the eye, the mouth, the nose, the ear, and our touch. With so much sensory stimulation is it any wonder that we formulate emotional attachments to food. The best chef would be the inherently passionate person, because their emotions can not help but spill into anything they do thus adding to the ultimate sensory experience.

Snif...Snif

2008-09-28T19:05:00.000-07:00

I told my little student Kyle the other day:

Me : "Kyle! Hey what if all smelly jerk faces really smelled."

Kyle: "Then wouldn't you be a jerk if you told them they smell."

Me : "No you'd just be honest."

This kid is like Will Ferrell meets Jack Black meets both Belushis My prediction is that he will be the one performing keg stands at University some day.

I still think it would be really cool if they really did stink. I mean we could even via natural selection weed them out. Who could really get close enough to stinky for procreation.

Black Panther Party

2008-09-20T06:20:00.001-07:00

From Saturday to Tuesday I'd coached 14 games in 4 days. Exhausted may have been an understatement by Wednesday. In between Saturday's tournament and Monday's invite I had the team over for a pasta and sock tie-dye party. The Pasta was a success, but lets just say a career move towards tye-dye would be a serious disaster. I learned most of the Napoleon Dynamite dance and promised to dance it at Tremper if we beat them. The team played so well, and only lost by two each game. SOOOOooooooooo close.
Have practice today later today, and some little girls to snuggle right NOW! :)

The Menu: Wheat pasta, Whole Grain Rolls, Sauce with Meatballs, Summer Spinach and Roman Salad.

Chocolate Fountain for desert with berries and fruit to dip. (*hint: Perfect way to get athletes eating lots of fruit :)

2008-09-10T04:38:00.000-07:00

Just dropping a quick line at 6:38 in the a.m. to announce.....

WE WON!!!!!!!!

our first match to date. Our first game was against Westosha central we beat them, and would have come back in the 3rd had their coach not done a shady thing. Needless to say its been a good week. Anitioc Thursday, tournament Saturday at St. Joes in Kenosha, and the BIGGIE.....Tremper High School Monday Sept. 15th.

Eye Muffs

2008-09-08T18:27:00.001-07:00

My Friend Grace sent me this. Bahhaahahahahahhahh!!!!

Culture Shock

2008-09-06T09:46:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone. For some reason Blogger was not letting me into my account. Some new rule about gmail. So I'm still alive. Start of the school year happened this week, and things went very well. The best way to describe my new school is culture shock. It couldn't be more different from my last position from size, demographic, facilities, even staff dynamics. Our principal announced that Normal People Suck (agreed!!) to the entire staff the second day of in service. In context that probably isn't as strange as it may sound singularly.
I do miss the familiarity of my last school, my former students who I'd built relationships with, co-workers, and the copy machines.
Well I have to run. As usual I have about 15 plates spinning and can't afford to let one drop.
Oh but coaching is amazing. I have 13 talented athletes, and leave me looking forward to the end of each day. Thanks Addie, Ashlyn, Belinda, Cassandra, Kelesy, Kelli, Niki, Caroline, Katilyn, Morgan, Alyssa, Caitlyn, and Brenna.

P.S. The song below is by Sheril Crow titled "I shall Beleive."

The Crusade Reunion

2008-08-24T18:56:00.000-07:00

In the last two days I have driven 800 miles just to bear witness to the nuptials of Jim Archer and Rebekah Ruess . I will spill about the wedding once my camera arrives from St. Cloud Minnesota, some time tomorrow, as Kel has stayed back for the annual Marschel fantasy football draft keeping the camera to capture any lively draft moments.
One of my favorite parts of the trek to the cities and back is picking my car tune play list. So to honor the marathon mileage I'm going to engage you all in name that tune. This was one of two songs I had on repeat for a good stretch of Wisconsin I94.

Come to me now
And lay your hands over me
Even if it's a lie
Say it will be alright
And I shall believe

I'm broken in two
And I know you're on to me
That I only come home
When I'm so all alone
But I do believe

That not everything is gonna be the way
You think it ought to be
It seems like every time I try to make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly you won't give up on me
And I shall believe
And I shall believe

Open the door
And show me your face tonight
I know it's true
No one heals me like you
And you hold the key

Never again
would I turn away from you
I'm so heavy tonight
But your love is alright
And I do believe

That not everything is gonna be the way
You think it ought to be
It seems like every time I try to make it right
It all comes down on me
Please say honestly
You won't give up on me
And I shall believe
I shall believe

Disney

2008-08-20T19:40:00.000-07:00

So I pretty much decided that Seattle is the equivalent to Disney Land for children of the 90's, and in light of this declaration I could not resist including more trip photos.

Enough Said.

Kel! Are you sure this thing is safe?

"Of course...See! Its totally safe."

" Alright then. Oh wait. What's happening!?!"

Help..HElp...HELP.....HEL.....HE..H...hh.h...!

A pic. hanging on the wall at Kel's Irish Pub that I thought was charming.

When the water on the left subsides there is a small child underneath reaching for their parent. Kind of strange.

A view from on top of the Space Needle. Before going up they take a photo of you and then try to sell it to you on the way down. When we posed for the pic. instead of smiling pretty I tried to be poking Kel in the eye. The photographer scolded me, and it reminded me of the people who come in to take your school I.D. Tilt your head left, chin down, knees to the right flash, and you it still looks like a mug shot.

For the baseball fans.

" I wish he would stop stoking my hair, and just feed the birds."

Former home of the Okay Cafe, movie site and plot point in Singles. :(

What is a crumpet you ask? Check out below.

Its the size of a bagel, but with the crevasses of an English muffin, and the texture of soft fluffy thick white bread. Yum!

Kind of personal.

Some of the hundreds of fresh flowers you can purchase at the market. Color, style, type, you name it and they'll arrange it. Smells out of this world.

Next Weekend We Rock PORTLAND!

2008-08-18T22:12:00.000-07:00

When Kelly and I first met we found a commonality in that we both loved the film Singles. I actually had two VHS (yikes I'm old) copies, but one I think I stole from my roommate Lynn who had stolen it from her friend Jeni. It could have been our resistance to the publics' outrageous love for Reality Bites, or our endearment for Bridget Fonda that cultivated that special place for Singles in both out hearts. But the more important element of this recant of the Kel and Michelle history is that it brought us together.

So as of Last week Kel and I spent 8 days running around Seattle celebrating the city of our collective favorite flick. I think the city has this Chicago meets San Francisco kind of feel with its plethora of organic produce coupled with its reverence for the arts.

I loved it, and told Kel he could pretty much get a third child out of me because of this very vacation. Check out the pics and fun memories of our time below.

Us out side of the 1st Star Bucks. Eat your heart out McClanes.

One Silver Astronaut.

Me enjoying some Guava at the Nectar Lounge.

Big Sigh!!!

Norms a cute little pub that allows patrons to bring in their pooches, and even has kibble on the menu for the furry members of your family.

He wore a shirt that said "Free and Clean 1 year." So I thought he earned it.

Can you tell I miss Nolan.

Standing on the corner waiting for the bus. Hey mister driver man don't be slow. Cause I've got somewhere I'd like to go.

Kel next to age enhanced photo of himself 5 hears into the future.

My five year outlook.

Look who I ran into. He told me not to touch him.

Pork and Beans local artist design that lives inside the 1st Star Bucks.

The view of the space needle for our not one...not two....not three...But 5 star hotel.

Just go with it.

2008-08-08T08:39:00.001-07:00

So I was talking with a girlfriend the other day, and we were kind of getting worked up over the topic. So we tried to diffuse one another and settle down, because you know negativity is not envouge.
I started to realize what was taking place. That we were talking one another down form a legitimately piss-off-able situation.
I think sometimes because women are often accused of being overly emotional, or over reactors instead embracing that natural tendency to emotionally release we try to avoid the stereo-type since sugar and spice and everything nice awards us more social brownie points.
So I stopped trying to silver line the pile of feces, and said :

"Hell if your angry just go with it."

I think the honesty may have been a bit disorientating. Like hey I have licence feel legitimately how I feel, and we didn't really know where to go from there. So we just laughed.

Church Tongue

2008-08-04T06:06:00.000-07:00

Me : Pssssssst....Karen! Hey do you want to start an organization with me to end child prostitution?

Karen : I think there already is one.

Me : A small laugh escaped my lips Even better!! You want to join an organization to help end child prostitution with me. I'm kind of in the mood to cure a social ill.

Exploritory Museum

2008-07-31T15:23:00.001-07:00

A few Saturday's ago we went to the Kohl's children's Museum. The Museum is very hands on and exploratory. Here are some fun pics from the day.

Audrey!! Look out his sedatives are wearing off.

My what a large nail file you have.

Mom and Faith on the look out for pirates.

Kids don't try this at home.

We got beat. Yeah we got it.

Water Works Area.

Audrey takes a tea break.

Faith clearing the tea dishes. Maybe its time for chores at home. Can you feel me doing the parents happy dance through the screen.

Instant Karma

2008-07-28T07:18:00.000-07:00

Last night was one of our open gym's for Volleyball, and this week is camp. 15 freshmen are signed up for camp, and it will be my first look at the potentials. Its also the first time that WIAA will allow any kind of instruction to take place since I landed the position. All these Sunday's watching poor form, or balls sail out of bounds the solution caught in my throat like lodged food and I gag to swallow it down. Not tonight!!! :)
Luke Braden came to discuss the camp schedule and said "Evening Coach" and that was like an instant teleportation to my happy place. Me Coach Marschel.

Its delightful.

The Silver Screen!!

2008-07-24T06:21:00.000-07:00

My man looking like Mavrick eating Pizza of course!
Scotch anyone?

Today is Kelly's Birthday. The summer we got engaged it was Kel's golden Birthday, and to celebrate in style I rented out the St. Paul student center theater, threw a surprise party, and had all his close friends a family watch Casa Blanca one of his top five all time favorite films.
I made like a trof of popcorn, and after the party we spread it out all over como park for the birds.
We sat in my parents Buick watching the critters enjoy the goods and promised never to try and top the party. That it wasn't a contest, and we could just enjoy the fun of this celebration eternally.

I remember Hannah asking me : "If you could see any film blown up on the silver screen just for your pure enjoyment alone which would it be?"

So in honor of the eternal celebration of Kel's golden B-day I put that question out there, and let the responses be a commemorative present for today.

Love you Kel.

Media Consent

2008-07-23T06:24:00.000-07:00

After strict contract negotiations with Ms. Krebs yesterday I was granted media privileges to display Nolan.

Nolan's induction into the Mafioso

Two mothers exhausted but still smiling.

Nolan is the sweetest little guy around. He rarely complains, eats like a champ, and sleeps like an angle. I call him the little bambino, and sing take me out to the ball game to him. I hope to inspire a love for baseball over football, because I think football is for pansies as Marv would put it. :)

I didn't really think there would be much difference from baby boys vs. baby girls accept for the art of the male diaper change. The whole pointing appendages in the right direction, and making sure the cold air on his bottom doesn't insight a stream of pee to the face is tricky. But he really is different in ways that both Faith and Audrey were similar. For example:

Sorry Buddy I've only got an abundance of pink items.

Faith would only go into the swing if she were in the comatose phase of sleep. Audrey would have nothing to do with the swing at all. Nolan I put in before he was tired and he sat content until he drifted off to la..la..land.

I can hold him in the crux of my arm and he is happy just to hang out. Faith needed back pats, stair climbing, and constant chatter. Audrey had to be held in a specific way, and my arm was permanently bent in that position for six months after she began to walk. Audrey also like the white noise of water rushing out a faucet.

The girls also seemed more responsive when you would talk to them. Nolan seems to like it much more when your playing pattie cake with his little arms. He also can be on his tummy for 3 whole min. without putting up a fuss. Where the girls had to do their tummy time 1.5 min. twice a day.

The biggest similarities I notice at this point is that all babies are totally geeked out by red, black, and white toys it is the colors infants see most prominently, and its so good for their brains to have exposure to toys and photos of these colors.

Otherwise I'm finding gender to be such a trip. I guess if there were some kind of guarantee that if Kel and I were to try for a third it could be a son I'd be in for sure. But since we seem to be girl producers I'm content with my daily Nolan fixes. His parental units have it in the works to get out of this two star town, but there really is no hope for me. I mean already attached to him, to his folks, it will be really hard to see them jet. Well gotta run the little bambino will be here soon.

Summer Lovin

2008-07-21T05:09:00.000-07:00

At the beginning of the summer Kel put together a small picnic table and sandbox for the girls to play with. Little did we know......

It all started one sunny Saturday afternoon Faith was causally building sand castles while Audrey was napping. I stayed in the living room keeping an eye on Faith as she played and simotantously listened for Audrey in case she woke up. I glance up from my book and instead of seeing one sandy blond head I see two raising pails and dumping sand. I stroll to the sliding glass door to check out who else is in the box, and it turns out to be the six year old boy whose back lawn runs right along our lot line. He and Faith are playing army pancake where they flip blue and green plastic soldiers in to the air with a plastic turner. They both giggle hysterically when the figurine crashes into sand, land, or wooden frame.

For days I watch as Faith goes out into the back yard and strolls along the edge of lot. Back and forth...back and forth drawing the attention of her new playmate. Its all very Penny Lane and Russ with a come here no stay there dynamic. I thought it was cute. Kel was a little worked up about it in that protective father kind of way.

Then one day Faith invited her friend inside to watch Care Bears with her. The moment they sat on the couch she turns to me and says "Mom can you get us some drinks. We want juice." I ask her friend if he would like some juice and once he agrees I remind Faith to use her manners. I get the cups and and bring them over to the coffee table and once they are set down Faith asks me to take their picture. I grab the camera and turn around to find them with their arms around each other posing. I snap the shot below and no sooner do I turn around when....

Next thing I know Faith has climbed into his lap and is playing his hand held video game system. Needless to say I was kind of shocked. So I told her to get out of his lap, and they need to stay one cushion apart on the coach from now on and always.

Italians by nature are a very affectionate culture, and that is often misinterpreted. So I took her aside and explained to her alone that she can not treat her new little friend the way she would her Papa (as she often would climb into his lap and take the electronic solitaire) or other close family members.

Sheesh who would have thought the sandbox was the pre-k hook up spot. lol I'm not ready for this.

As for Audrey the latest most darling behavior she's been doing happens when it rains. We have been getting a lot of thunderstorms and heat lightening lately, and with each rumble and crash she throws her little arms around my neck covers me with her tiny body and says I protect you. I kind of hug her back and whisper thanks, and say a silent prayer that I will be granted the wisdom and strength to do the same for her.

Holy Shirts and Pants

2008-07-18T08:58:00.000-07:00

We went to 17 weddings this season and we rocked them ALL!!

Kel and I invited close to 50 people to our wedding crashers party, and of the roughly 20 guests only 8 were original invites the rest were all crashers. I think that pretty much means the essence or spirit of what we were trying to accomplish prevailed. Yes Chaz we did you proud you old kook. Well gotta run and get the man some meatloaf.

Dibs on the Red Head. She's all yours. I'm not gonna fight ya.

Carried over the threshold barefoot and all.

The nude gay art show.

Parents just want to have fun...Oh parents just want to have fun..they just wanna...they just wanna..aaa!

Oh! Matt you know what that means.

McClane found the one he's taking to bed.

Future Crasher.

The bonus points prize! Courtesy of the talented Kelly Rice, and no she was not generous with the fig leaf. :)

Crab Cakes and Football...That's what Maryland does.

I also love how Tiff's Senior picture is in this one.

Me and My running buddy

Is Jake having fun. I don't know its hard to tell.

Rachel and Stephanie high class crashers.

Okay so the Red head was popular!

A little bit of the sacrament?

Cake Fight

Wedding Day Revenge.

The first slice.

Thanks Paielli's for the butter cream dream.

Ode to the Graphic Novel

2008-07-16T05:38:00.000-07:00

Okay so I've been totally addicted to Frank Miller lately. I've literally devoured Sin City volumes one and two taking copious mental notes on the brilliant gender themes running through the novels, and think I could have written an entire phd. thesis for the Women Studies department on them. Millers captivating black and white world of dames and brutes is genius. I read them while listening to the resilient ballades of Pearl Jam, and feel like the parts of myself worth keeping inch back to the surface recognizing that familiar and safe environment that cultivated them in the first place. Its repairative. Its Good.

But before I delve into my ideas and its relevance I woke up this morning and thought about the nature of graphic novels. Graphic novels I believe are like the ultimate display of postmodernism. They relay on images and art to convey their messages as much as the the plot, narratives, and surrounding culture to reveal their messages about ethics, good, and evil, as well as the blending of human qualities with supernatural abilities. But it still seems as if they haven't really taken off. I mean Barns and Nobles only has two stock shelves to house the entire stores collection of graphic novels where at least 4-5 stock shelves are lined with magazines, murder mysteries, and romance novels. Obviously you could purchase graphic novels at specialty stores, and Boards too. But what B and N stocks is a pretty good indicator of what main stream America is reading. I thought of several reasons why graphic novels are underestimated:

1. Their expensive. Both to purchase and to create. It take writes, artists, inkers, publishers to create these virtually bound still frame films, and that means they are kind of like yachts. Only a small amount of people will buy them, or save for them but the group that will is highly dedicated and their dollars as good as any so its worth the investment. But like the expensive wave gliders not many are going to get made. lol Made.

2. Cartoons and Comic books are perceived as childish, and this is a hard hurdle to jump. The adults who continue to read graphic novels are often the brunt of jokes, and inspire characters like Comic Book Guy on the Simpsons, and Mr. Glass from Unbreakable. I don't know how many times I've prefaced my love for the literary category with "Okay I know this makes me a total nerd but...."

3. Making these novels into films actually hurts them as people will opt to see the movie over actually reading it. And its easy to make them into films because the script and visual ideas are already there to spring from.

4. Thrusting a childish concept like cartoons or comic strips into adult themes and natures is a difficult transition for most people to make. Shows like the Simpsons, Family Guy, South Park are helping ease that transition, and are probably the reason B and N two stock shelves at all.

5. Graphic novels are often perceived as hyper violent or too fantastical, and its the frozen nature of them that. Flash a corpse on CSI and its just as impactful to our Psyche, but it doesn't feel that way when the corpse is frozen on a page that you can return to repeatedly and actually need to almost study or interpret to get the full sense of what the writer is trying to convey. They are no more or less violent or fantastical (like an island with polar bears, a set of investigators of aliens, or a group of mutated people who are going to save earth ) than television they just can't hide it as well as television / film does with its pace.

I'm sure there are more like just a natural displeasure for reading, or being to busy for leisure, but I really do think they are worth a good risk. Come on nerds are totally charming. All that said more on Frankie to come.

Jen & Jason vs. Tony & Tina

2008-07-15T07:06:00.000-07:00

I went to a wedding last weekend that was so much fun that I actually thought it would be nice if halmark made a thank you card I could send the newlyweds to express my gratitude for the good times.

Kel and I traveled to Green Bay, and neither of us had ever been. I was kind of expecting something straight out of Oz. Like the Emerald City everything draped in green and gold, but with the Fox river and factories it reminded me more of Sartel.

The reception started with outdoor cocktails on the patio river side. Then we moved indoors to a red and black casino themed dinning hall. Each table was named after one of the extravagant Vegas hotels. We danced all night, and Kel banked at the black jack tables. It was like a mini jubilant vacation in one evening. The couple should do it again charge people the cost of a weekend in Vegas, and sincerely you would leave having blown off enough steam to feel refreshed. Oh wait I think Tony and Tina already did that. :)

Check out the incriminating evidence.

The Krebs Originals!

Dad and Daughter Dance...snif..snif...

The Mr. and Mrs. Smith Shot

What?

Kel Banking Big! :)

The adorable couple

Nice Action Shot Kel

Yum!

Sassy!~!

Jamie getting into it.

Father and Son

Nolan's First Wedding!

Come on girls show a little teeth :)

Wingspan

Me and my future

The Fox River and the view from our room. It actually reminds me a lot of my room at Comstock hall at the U of M. The rising sun the next day too. :)

Our cozy room. Kel downsized to a large twin so we could cuddle. lol

No Zack's Allowed

2008-07-14T12:28:00.000-07:00

Today I married my best friend!!!

Host:
Michelle Marschel

Location:
The Marschel Home

When:
Wednesday, July 16, 6:30PM

It's WEDDING SEASON!!

Come celebrate with Shamus O'Toole and Bobby O'Shea as you witness the commitment nuptuals of Baba Ganushe and Where'smylittle Friend. There will be crab cakes, music, open bar, garder toss, and wedding cake. I'd like you to be pimps from Oakland or cowboys from Arizona, but if you can't just come as a Cocksman or any old venture capitalist.

Hope to see you there ~ fellow crasher

*Bonus Points* if you bring someone that Kelly and Michelle don't know. Who knows, maybe you'll win a door prize.

P.S. I'd just like to say that I got the door prize in the mail today and Kelly Rice is a Goddess ;)

Captian Caveman

2008-07-13T17:24:00.000-07:00

One of the main speakers in my class this summer had just returned for a stint in Africa, and she used poetry, music, rhythm, and parable story telling to convey her messages to the audience.

While most of the other students were interested in finding out where she had purchased her drum adorned with shakable beading for added rhythmic accompaniment. I wanted to know how her methods could be formally assessed. She told me by the students behavior.

I could not have given the same response during any of my formal interviewing processes if I wanted to make a good impression.

I then asked her if the use of animals and nature helped students embrace the moral because any distinguishable factors would only present distraction. And by distinguishable features I mean if the main characters gender, age, ethnicity, origin all present opportunities for listeners to be dismissive. If the character does not resemble the listener then they have mean to detach themselves from the story and set themselves apart as distinct. Its kind of sad when your trying to encourage positive and good behavior that students look for ways to distance themselves from the message, but its a natural human tendency this need for relateablitiy.
She told me to stop left braining it. (I'm not really sure what that meant, but I took it as stop asking me questions unless its about my drum ;)

In Mathew 13 : 34 - 35 it says " Jesus spoke all these things to the crowd in parables; he did not say anything to them without using a parable. So was fulfilled what what spoken thought the prophet: "I will open my mouth in parables, I will utter things hidden since the creation of the world. "

It did strike me during this instructors presentation that if she tells a story about a lion, elephant, and monkey each with distinct personalities and a specific role to play in the plot its natural to identify with one personality in the tale typically you gravitate to the one who you think you are the most similar to, or is most relevant to something you are dealing with and come away with good insight. But tell the same story with gender, age differentials, ethnicity, or class distinction and the message get entangled in the characters and the separateness you maintain from them. And Christ has been using parables all along even spoke only in them irregardless of his audience. Capitalizing on the use of nature, but not limited to it for his messages.

So I spent roughly 500 dollars to gain exposure to a teaching concept that was the corner stone of my greatest role models teaching fundamentals. I wonder how many more times I'll run into a reinvention of the wheel. Sheesh

Your First!

2008-07-10T06:03:00.000-07:00

In general people seem to have an easier time remembering their first anything. Maybe its a picture that commemorates the event like a 1st Birthday party, and typically the day that people try cake or ice cream initially too. Or the first book you ever read maybe for school or for enjoyment. Your first crush. First love interest. First relationship. First kiss. When you may have first encountered Christ, or committed to taking your Faith life seriously. Some people make a habit of trying something for the first time every day to maintain a spirit of adventure and youth.

I have been meaning to thank Duck Hunter for being my first poster of comment. Since the dawn of my blog you have been a consistent reader and commenter, and always provided a kind word or funny phrase even taking the time to send well wishes for Birthday's, Anniversaries, and Holidays. I have enjoyed the peeks into your family life, that nature hikes that seem to bring the reader right along, and the photo graphs to visually accompany and capture the moments. I really couldn't have asked for a better blogger companion to come along. It makes me feel like that is what these forum are meant for.

So thanks Duck Hunter for getting it, and living it. You are a blessing.

Sunday's Meditations

2008-07-08T07:31:00.000-07:00

Here is what I said on Sunday. I got a lot of good responses, and really appreciated all the encouragement. I tried to stand on the floor, but moved to the platform second service so people could see and hear more effectively. I also danced a bit with my feet. Well Kelly said it looked more like a choreographed river dance, but I didn't as much second service. I also need to slow the pace down, and type out the versus cause I fumbled with my Bible to get thing read. Never hurts to critically reflect for improvement then the concentration is on the words not the person. You should I think be as invisible as possible to prevent distraction. That I will tie into some thoughts I've been having about the effectiveness of parables.

Tithe

How many of you remember the cartoon: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?

That outrageous Saturday morning show with the adult sized turtles mutated by radioactive waste resulting in intellect and the mastery of Karate skills.

One of my favorite in the crew was Michelangelo. He loved to surf, and whenever he was excited about an idea or got to ride a wave he would say “Radical”. One word to sum up a variety of delightful life events.

The other day I was coming out of a store when this large and burly man called out and asked me for a ride to Super Valu a grocery store on the other side of town. This guy was smoking and leaning against the bus stop, and had many backpacks with him. I think he could read the hesitance in my face and told me the buses had stopped because of an accident on Green Bay road. That his girlfriend was inside a store exchanging a teddy bear he had bought for some candy, and that he would run and get her.
It was kind of one of those moments where no one would blame me for moving on given that I was much smaller than this stranger, and alone. But inside me I felt like this was one of those pivotal moments to act radically for Christ. So I agreed to take him and his girlfriend.
I quick call Kelly and tell him what I’m up to. The man introduces his girlfriend as Anna as she tells me her name is Jill, and as we are leaving the parking lot I see two city buses pull up to the stop we’d just moved from.
I tell the couple about my small children and all the students I teach at school while mentally making escape routs in my head to jump from the van if I need too.
They tell me about drunken escapades that get them fired from work and alienated them from many friends / family.
When we pull up to the store they hop out and the man keeps shaking my hand saying thanks and telling me not to forget the homeless. I told him I don’t.

Now some of you maybe thinking wow that was dangerous, or wow what a great chance to be bold for Christ. A radical step of faith. And where I was thankful to be used in that situation, and very thankful that nothing dangerous did result we don’t really need instances like this to be radical for Christ.

It is a radical display of faith every Sunday when we come together and give offerings to Christ. It does not come natural for people to give money away. The security to hold onto these blessings is very comfortable, and very appealing. Understandable even in the same way it would have been understandable for me to leave this couple at the bus stop, but ultimately we would be missing out. Missing out on a chance to mature in our relationship with Christ, to form a trust, to surrender an idol, to get a little less comfortable, and little more reliant on the Spirit to radically display the love we share with Christ, with one another, and with the Church through offering.

Tell first time attendees that service is a gift for them, and ask everyone to pray.

Heavenly Father thank you for this time to give to your Holy Kingdom. Please use these gifts for your glory, and grant wisdom and guidance to those who manage these decisions to sustain and advance the body of Christ.

Amen

Communion:

Kelly and I have been doing a lot of cross-state driving lately. In anticipation for these 8 hours of highway driving I picked up these If books. The black one asks deep questions on any topic and the gold is the racy version for you married couples when the kids have dozed off, or are engrossed in the travel DVD player.

Kelly and I had a lot of fun asking one another questions. I kept wanting him to answer first and vice versa. It seemed like once the pressure was off it was easier to think of an answer, or at least top the other persons.

One of the questions in the black book was: If you only had one night left how would you spend it? (REPEAT ??)

Maybe I would eat fried baloney on bread I’d baked, while learning to sail in the channels of Italy having just finished planting a garden. You know get all those items on my lifetime accomplishments list fulfilled.

Or
Most likely I’d have a huge dress up theme party based upon an obscure film surrounding my self with friends and family.

In Mathew 26: 20 – 30 the word says: (Read Scripture)
On the night Christ was betrayed he choose to spend it sharing the Passover meal with his closest companions. His actions that evening we believers choose to remember every Sunday as we take communion. Allowing this time as the disciples did to participate with God nourishing ourselves physically as well as spiritually as we enter into a time of prayer and communication with Christ. Fulfilling his desire for us to do this in remembrance of Him.

We here at N.P. practice open communion. This means that any person who professes Christ as the Son of God savior and redeemer may eat the bread and drink the cup. Please pray with me:
Heavenly Father I ask that you please remove any sin or grievance I or my brothers and sisters in Christ may be dealing with right now so that we may come before you with clean and pure hearts to speak freely and hear most clearly any messages or guidance you might have for us. Help us to live lives worthy of the title Christian relying on the strength and mercy of your spirit in all circumstances. Thank you for going to the cross to resolve us of our sins, and for bring us here today to celebrate your son with acts of worship and praise.

Amen

American Bandstand

2008-07-07T06:58:00.000-07:00

I made up a song this morning to the tune from the Never Ending Story.

Here is the first line of lyrics:

The Never Ending Laundry......ohohohohohooooohohohohoho The Never Ending Laundry!!

Any one care to take a guess at what is on the agenda for today?

Yesterday went really well, so thanks everyone who prayed for me. I promise to post more on that later.

The Limited

2008-07-05T12:02:00.000-07:00

I went to a workshop on leadership development, and discovered that I'm not that good of a leader.
True I've got charisma.
True I look out for others best interests.
True I'm a good listener.
True I'm teachable.
True I'm a problem solver.
True I'm positive
True I'm encouraging
True I like to bring the best out in others
True I'm articulate
And
True I'm diplomatic (a.k.a. grace orientated but honest)

But I'm also

Impulsive
Intellectual
Naive
Image driven
Competitive
Immature
Extrema
and maybe the most detrimental is that I have poor boundaries.

I think that recognizing your potential and your flaws helps you to navigate circumstances and life situations more successfully. But the wall that I keep running into is a miss calculations of what is best for me. This concept of I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me has been miss represented or perverted in my understanding. I have limitations, and I have needs and the pursuit of a selfless / sacrificial life makes meeting those need or having those needs met seem weak or selfish.

But what this workshop suggested was that students think being a good leader means they are constantly helping others, and are busy. They get burnt out because they don't take good care of themselves, and then have nothing left to give. We loose countless outstanding leaders to this dynamic.

So as a leader who has fallen prey to the perversion of Philippians 4:13 I grant permission to all other leaders out there to boldly admit your limitations embrace them and go forth and get your needs met. Don't apologize for having needs cause we all do. And if someone makes you feel guilty or punishes you for those needs well that is evil and a force that is bent on seeing you get burnt out. Sometimes probably even more often than not its the one looking back at us from the mirror that generates the guilt and pride, so make sure your greatest bully isn't you.

The Times they are...

2008-07-02T06:29:00.000-07:00

Puddle Jumping = BRILLIANT

It is certainly one of my favorite pass times, and that appears to be genetic!! One of the good aspects for all this Midwest precipitation.

While Audrey was jumping on the coach this morning simultaneously finishing a string cheese.

Faith whisper to her form the hallway: "Audrey come here......Come here Audrey."

Audrey looks up with her head resting on the coach arm, a cheek bulging with mozzarella, an inquisitive glint in her eyes, as she shakes her foot to reading it to move off the cushion.

Faith then says : "Come on you want to see my pee?"

Needless to say I put a stop to any pee viewing, but couldn't help but laugh over Faith processing everyone celebration over Audrey's bathroom success. Guess she is just trying to be included more.

In other significant life transitions and changes I am going to be giving the communion and tithe meditation this weekend. A frightened yet hopeful Michelle approached P.T. last winter about being worked into the rotation, and was thrilled to find permission behind the conversation. So please pray for me to decrease and be used by the Spirit. It is also my heart that more women would internalize their leadership potential in all aspects of church, and challenge any sexist attitudes by this small boldness. I don't want to be dismissed as an anomaly I'd like my gender to be a flood gate for more leaders to flow through. Although I don't care much for Bobby D. I find my self humming his tune "Yes the times they are a changing."

Collective Soul : Needs

2008-07-01T11:28:00.001-07:00

I have been spending a lot of time in my car. Driving around the Midwest has always been a treat for me. I welcome the chance to sit and reflect over a long stretch of highway while simultaneously accomplishing a goal (making your way towards a destination), and play c.d. after c.d. orchestrating my personal road trip mix tape. Not an actual mix tape, but a selection of songs to get you from point a. to point b. that inevitably leaves you wishing you had to drive a little longer. For my latest route I went through all of our collection of c.d.'s and picked out favorites that I hadn't listened to in ages. One was a mix of songs Phoebe had created for me when we were both engaged. At that point pretty much the rapture could have happened, and we both would have stayed on cloud nine from the love haze.
The very last song on this album is by Collective Soul and its entitled Needs.

It begins with "All around me. I see what weakness has made...."
Then says "I find convince in the savior I save. Am I your poison. A source of bad news. Another thorn in the side. A picture perfect subject of pride."
And the choirs "I don't need no body. I just need to learn the depth or doubt of faith to fall into."

One of the break out session I attended in Madison was and organization called DELTA that is committed to working with students to help raise consciousness to Media messages that perpetuate sexual violence against women. They have only been around for five years, and are currently hosting groups in two high schools. Our presenters talked about how Women's Horizon has been around for 25 years, and hasn't managed to prevent or even lessen the pace or instances of violence against women. Its hard to admit when something good is also ineffective, so I applaud the critical thinkers and realists who managed to high light this in the first place. Very bold, very courageous of you. So from this realization people began to think about new solutions, and thus emerged DELTA.

Basically this group goes into high schools and meets with young women and young men provides a space for introspection and honest discussion about the thoughts and behaviors that lead to sexist attitudes.

Theresa our main presenter said the missing link for Women's Horizon is that it excludes men from the process. We can not solve societal issues in a bubble if the society demands that both genders interact. Its an incomplete solution to rest all the burden on one or the other gender it makes it a battle field and fighting one another only divides us deeper.
Now not to toot the horn of women or anything, but I do think that it is from our natural tendencies to be care givers that this solution was arrived upon at all. In general I think its because women are either inherently more concerned or conditioned by societal constructs to be more concerned with the well being of others that a fertile ground for unselfish and progressive behavior could even come to be. To recognize men as victims of gender stereo-types and media miss representations of hyper masculinity could only have taken place because of women recognition of how these factors have played into our own demise, and lent us to have a care for our male counterparts not to suffer as we have. Its a win win really.

At any rate what Theresa and company have done is establish virtually a small group model. It is almost exactly the same in structure and student directed learning as any bible study might be. And it was interesting to hear her present the model in a secular context, and tell me that students drawing their own conclusions and group facilitators main role is to ask leading questions was almost cute. Cute in that it was nice to see someone excited about an idea as if it were fresh, but all too familiar to me. I wasn't pious about it I was excited for her as she and her committed group of followers, believing inherently in their cause fleshing out constructive solutions through trial and error constantly re-evaluating each success and failure striving for better models.

DELTA is a perceived feminist group weather they choose to be labeled in that way or not. And at the hands of their liberal affiliation I'd be willing to bet that conservatives are leery of their efforts and that is why Madison the city where liberal is king is a terrific place to birth an endeavor like this.

The divide between liberal and conservatives was never more apparent to me than after attending this session. There is virtually no trust between the two groups that they have anything to offer one another, and education seems to be the only place that they are forced to have to come together. Most of this coming together looks like a collide of ideology, and the aftermath is typically one victor over another. Whoever wins gets their curriculum in place. These curriculum's are almost always lacking, and then we wonder why nothing ever changes.

My greatest plea at this point is that the church would recognize that the world has beneficial ideas to offer it. I make my plea to the Church because my investment in the campaign of the gospel and people going to heaven is greater than trying to transform the world into a pathetic version of heaven. As we strive for solutions to worldly problems new ones will only arise. It is the nature of a fallen place we can not fix what is irreversibly damaged only God can. But it does not mean that we (the church) do not have the responsibility to take ever measure possible to drive evil out of everything we can.

DELTA could have benefited and been vastly further in their construction of a small group if they would have looked to the church for solutions and models. It is the same the church needs to look to the world/ secular venues for solutions as well. If we do not we will become more and more frustrated with the lack of progress in advancing the gospel and seeing individuals having gratifying sincere loving relationship with the Holy Spirit. If we do not straddle the gap between secular and spiritual we will be ill equipped (to use a Juno line) for what the enemy has in store for us, and God will only continue to push us to points of desperation and force us to change.

I read a Marie Claire magazine at the start of the summer and after reading 101 sex tips, and 4 articles on office infidelities. I remembered one concept that helped me with an adulator's situation. If you are a Christian you have to trust that your world view will inherently allow the Spirit to filter this information and make it useful for the Kingdom. That the spirit is inside you, and He will not let you cling to unholiness or rubbish even if it means traveling to the darkest places of yourself.

I beg you Church and believer to find the depth or doubt of faith to fall into. If your heart is sincere Christ will bear it with you, and you will be protected. I have lived this protection and seen it in other believers lives.

Love Always,
Michelle

Entertain Responsibly

2008-06-30T05:49:00.001-07:00

When I was in elementary school I watched the film cloak and dagger. After watching the movie I decided my life was not exciting enough, so I brought a knife with me to day care. I don't know why I thought bringing a knife to school would increase the adventure, but somehow I translated the rush of excitement that the film insighted into bringing a dangerous object with me to school. I showed the knife to my best friends, and they told my teachers who then snuck it out of my bag wrapped it up and called my parents about the incident. Looking back now I'm lucky I wasn't suspended indefinitely from both my day care, and my elementary school. But I think the antic was so out of character for me that people thought there must be a logical conclusion for this mistake. And there was, but no one seemed to understand when I kept saying "I just wanted more excitement or adventure in my life." To do something daring or heroic like the kid in cloak and dagger. Who would have though from that moment I would later go on to be an honor roll student, and graduate with a masters from a respectable University.

In my wellness course last week there was a key note that talked about the origins of hip hop music, and how its roots were very productive. According to my source it arose out of the broncs as a from of artistic release from all the squalor that surrounded the residents. Land lords had started bruning down their properties to collect insurance money, and the tenants couldn't afford to move so they stayed inside the remnants of the burned structures. The youth started spinning records and matching beats under the street lamps and the entire neighborhood would gather to watch the dancing and enjoy the music. Like a gigantic block party. The trains and buses were symbols of movement and escape and that is why they would graffiti them. So that something beautiful would continuously emerge in a consistent track through their world.
It wasn't until it became a marketable image that much of the female degrading and anti-educational messages surfaced. And these messages get internalized by a youth culture that seems to have difficulty separating the sensationalized image / entertainment factor that is the result of the corporitization of hip hop. Leading many youth to make poor choices that have life long consequences. The speaker said that in his research he discovered that one of the leading hip hop record labels was also one of the nations leaders in the manufacturing of prison buildings. I think the row in front of me heard my stomach lurch as the impact of that fact swarmed it. Now I think it would be a terrible straw man to attack and blame hip hop music for raising a generation of jail birds. But I would say that it has significantly lost its roots when Little Wayne is not cooking angle dust in his kitchen, and singing praises about the duffel bag of money he will receive for the drugs.
As the course finished up I also took a breakout session on improving the nutritional climate of a school. The speaker said that 1 in 4 children are developing diabetes, and the rate will continue to grow as our processed convenience foods become more available and consumed and our entertainment / relaxation techniques remain on the sedentary end of the spectrum. It occurred to me that maybe coke or pepsi might not only be one of the nations for runners in spurring on diabetic population growth, but it wouldn't surprise me to discover that they were also one of the leading mass producers of insulin. I haven't looked into it yet, but if any of you happen to know who is the leading producer of insulin I'd be curious to see who is mastermind behind the curtain. I like to call this concept in bed. Who is Pepsi in bed with, or the hip hop record distributor the closest of companions to? Who is the butter on their bread? It kind of leave me in awe and sick at the same time.
Its not that censorship or boycotts is really the answer its more instructing individuals on recreation and entertainment. When you outlaw something it only makes it more desirable or enticing. I mean during the whole hip hop presentation I was thinking about the mirror. What veins of entertainment do I participate in that is just as degrading, or sends poor societal messages. We all have our little guilty pleasures, but what is different now from my kindergarten cloak and dagger escapade is that I am an adult and can recognize the entertainment factor. I don't need a Coach bag to enjoy fashion or feel validated in my life. We just have the opportunity in this country to enjoy things to excess, and exploit the very value it held in the first place. We just need to be responsible with our entertainment.

A week of Wedding

2008-06-25T11:19:00.000-07:00

Last weekend I went to my Bother in Law Micheal's wedding ceremony. It was in the tradition of the old testament a celebration over many days and nights:

Thursday - men gather for last single man time of horse shoe and cards

Friday - ceremony rehearsal and dinner celebration

Saturday - pictures, nuptials full mass ceremony, dinner, and dance reception

Sunday - gift opening.

Here are some pics of the visit.

Bride + Groom and attendants!

St. John's Elton John tribute

The Head Table

Katie and latest addition Elise Berndt

Pew Pic.

Micheal and Mother

Dad and Micheal

Faith and Tyren showing Micheal and Ann how its done.

Audrey makes the guest list

Audrey hugs mom before ceremony

Matured Perception

2008-06-25T10:27:00.000-07:00

One uneventful summer evening back in the summer of '98 my friend Christopher Heidamen brought over the film "The Devil's Advocate" to help pass the time. Neither of us had seen it, and I knew nothing about the plot. But Al Pacino was in it, and given my father's physical likeness to the actor I'm pretty much up for any film that includes him in the cast.
The film turned out to be very dark with a battle for good and evil and Al playing the anti-Christ. The climax leads to a monologue with Al talking about God being a hypocrite, and he being the fan of man nurturing every great idea we humanity has ever prided itself upon. I remember at the time identifying with the words, and feeling persuaded, but at the same time chilled by that response. Almost grossed out by my buying into the logic.
After accepting Christ as my personal savior I watched the film again, and this time drawing the conclusion that if the Devil got it he wouldn't be in the position he is in. I was very excited by this idea at the time and ran around telling every believer I knew about this fascinating discovery. Despite this ground breaking discovery my perception of evil or more specifically Satan remained one of the aggressive teenager who just didn't get along with Dad. Like Dr. Phil could come along and perform his family interventions and reconciliation could take place.

At this point I almost wish I could have stayed in my naive perceptions, but like in other ways that adulthood seems to have snuck up on me my understanding of evil has been matured. I born witness too some pretty awful elements of humanity this year. I've seen people just be unnecessarily cruel and graceless bullies objects of vengeance. Insecurities covered by anger and aggression, and the thought processes that lead to justifying these types of behaviors. Very ugly, and certainly had multiple affects on me some even leading to my own digressions.

Needless to say evil is no mere confused adolescent. It is calculated, cruel, merciless, ruthless, and damaging. It is relentless, and heeds nothing to a raised white flag. It attacks and attacks and attacks, and should not be underestimated. If God had to die to bring victory over it well why on earth doesn't that represent the magnitude of the advisory.

Before if I'd met the anti-Christ in a dark ally I would have felt compassion tried to help, and you'd think that situation would be scary dark ally + evil. Or that even now with all these brushes with evil I'd be afraid, but honestly I'm kind of pissed off. If Satan were in a dark ally acting wounded or hiding I'd want to beat the crap out him send him back where he belongs.
Lately I imagine my self singing the Fiona Apple song below at him, and then........

Get Gone lyrics
How many times do I have to say To get away-get gone
Flip your shit past another lasses Humble dwelling
You got your game, made your shot, and you got away With a lot,
but I'm not turned-on
So put away that meat you're selling
Cuz I do know what's good for me- And I've done what I could for you
But you're not benefiting, and yet I'm sitting Singing again, sing, sing again
How can I deal with this, if he won't get with this
M'I gonna heal from this; he won't admit to it
Nothing to figure out; I gotta get him out
It's time the truth was out that he don't give a S*** about me
How many times can it escalate
Till it elevates to a place I can't breathe?
And I must decide, if you must deride
That I'm much obliged to up and go I'll idealize,
then realize that it's no Sacrifice, because the price is paid, and There's nothing left to grieve F***** go- Cuz I've done what I could for you, and I do know what's Good for me and I'm not benefiting,
instead I'm sitting singing again, singing again, singing again, Sing, sing, sing again
How can I deal with this,
if he won't get with this
M'I gonna heal from this;
he won't admit to it
Nothing to figure out;
I gotta get him out
It's time the truth was out that he don't give a S*** about me

with the most intense of gazes I would move as close as I could and in a breathy whisper say "CHRIST HAS THE VICTORY" and delight watching the fitful hysterics that would ensue over the very truth spoken into his vain arrogance.

Lost and Found

2008-06-23T11:51:00.000-07:00

I feel like so much is going on I'm not sure where to begin. I keep making copious things to do lists to ensure that I don't miss a step, and I'm sure I'm going to loose my keys. In college every time I got this busy I lost my keys 90 dollars in replacement locks later I finally took a breath.

The first day of summer vacation kicked off with the onset of Audrey's road to diaper freedom. We took off her soiled morning huggie (with much protest from Daddy), and never looked back.

With only two accidents the first day I was convinced she is a toilet champ. Kel remained skeptical, but given that he wasn't exactly instrumental in Faith's potty learning curve I stayed firm. Roughly 10 days later she maybe an accident happens every third day.

She almost always has a snuggie these days :).

Here is one to bring out when the boyfriend comes over. When she is finished she raises her little arms in the air and says "WooHoo I did it!!"

Last weekend my Brother in Law Micheal got hitched, and stories and pictures are on the way from the blessid event.

I have been taking a course that I will finish this week in Madison Wisconsin to earn my last credit towards keeping my teaching liscense relevant. Kitty and John Bowen are the course instructors, and they are so very thankful towards one another. Every time John takes the mic. from Kitty he says "Thank You Kitty." and you'd think she just got done giving him a warmed towle to hop into after a nice shower, or a martini with two olives and a colored glass stir. The whole car ride home from St. Cloud I mimicked the Bowen grattitide thanking Kelly for making safe lane changes and feeding me crazens while I drove.

Well I have to run and use my car before were down to only one set of keys.

Low Riders

2008-06-17T18:31:00.000-07:00

Last weekend we were invited to our first car show. Lizzie K. and Fam. have been frequenters of these hot rod events for years, and included us in the fun. It was a warm and breezy day perfect for learning about Hemis, rims, and body work. I must admit that the names and styles are a whirlwind blur that poured from my lovely girl, but as we get more of these events under our belts I expect to learn the lingo like a pro albeit the girls will probably learn it all first.

Audrey the little Tuner Girl!

Mish and Liz in front of the bat-girl mobile

The girls fighting over a Chevy

You would think they hadn't only just met. But some connections are just stronger than time. Faith told Kim that she had many goals she was going to accomplish when she get older. And then she announced that older was when she turned 5.

Summer Kick Off's

2008-06-13T11:59:00.000-07:00

Last weekend we made our first fountains picnic of the season. It was a bit chilly, but that didn't stop Faith from running in the sprays until she was purple lipped and shivering. Audrey on the other hand was more timid and warmer.

The anticipation is written all over their faces.

This little guy was packing a grill with that grin.

Timido

Purple lipped and loving it. Who is that cut white boy in the background!?!

Audrey being bold. That a girl Aud.

It always shocks me how different the girls are in coloring and personality. I mean for sharing the same womb any outsider would have to be told they were sisters. Genes are such a trip.

Two

2008-06-11T15:00:00.000-07:00

At the dawn of my Blog I wrote this post. Yesterday I talked with the head athletic director of Wilmot, and as of Thursday I will be the Freshman squad Volleyball coach. So cross off number two on the life time accomplishment list. After Thursday I'm going to call Lynn and Shanna to break the news. When I get the schedule I'll post it for those who can make a game.

In other firsts Nolan Llyod Kreye was born Monday June 9th. 7 lbs 14 oz to the proud parents Kristal Krebs and Josh Kreye. He is darling, and I may get to watch him this summer while mom is taking college credits. I can't wait to hold him, and Faith has gotten to kiss his forehead before even me. But I must admit I'm very happy Kristal and Josh are the new parents, and zero inspiration for a third addition to the Marschel clan was stirred. Congratulations K. and J.

Updates

2008-06-07T06:28:00.000-07:00

I guess many of you could probably sing the where in the world is Carmen Sandiago song for me and my blog lately.

To be honest I'm pretty terrible at keeping secrets, so I've kind of had to stay off the blogs until certain events came to pass.

I went for an interview at Wilmot Union High school a few weeks ago. The school is stunning with piles of natural light, all brand spanking new facilities, modernized technologies, every pillar is plastered with student achievement, and it all kind of has the same feel of Madison Universities student Union. I may literally have been drooling during the walk through.
The interview went well, and less than 24 hours later I was offered the position pending school board approval two weeks from then. For two weeks I had to keep silent, and was on edge that something would trip all this up.

I've never attended a school board meeting before, and this was very eye opening. Its actually much more candid than one would expect. People are pretty straight forward, and even direct about the politics of things. For example the school is looking for a new head football coach, and you would be surprised the rationals that go into hire or re-opening the position.

After my approval I told the administration, board, and all others in attendance :
"I applied to your district before I even knew a position existed. Your reputation proceeds you through out the state. And I will do everything I can to contribute to that reputation." Which was met with grins, and approving head nods all around.

I'm not sure if this year hadn't been so challenging if I'd ever considered going outside the district for employment. Sometimes I think we need to be given a good shove in the right direction. I have been very busy trying to get things packed up to end this school year, and to try and be as prepared as possible for next. But I couldn't be more excited for this new transition.

So the boat tossed me and after a wild sea tumble I've arrived at a very new and promising place. Thanks all of you who pray for me diligently it is by those of the faithful my life is blessed by Christ.

The Continental Divide

2008-05-29T14:55:00.000-07:00

On our new Monday night family adventures down by the lake Faith has taken to shouting "Yeah were in Kenosha." whenever we pass our old house.

In high school I remember taking drivers ed with a friend from class. One night my parents couldn't get me to the class, and I asked if I could bum a ride with her. She said yes, but latter refused when she found out I lived close to the inner state. My Dad while justifiably annoyed by my Friends recanted invite laughed with me and we talked about how the people this town act like they have to travel to Iowa if its more than 5 min. from their home.

This area is broken up into Kenosha, Kenosha County, and Pleasant Prairie. Even though the house of my adolescent years and my current home are inside Kenosha we are only a mere block or two from being in Pleasant Prairie. Kenosha purists (a.k.a. any one who lives on Persian Plaza or east of that) considers our neighborhood Pleasant Prarie, and there is a very real turn your nose up at the Pleasant Prairie residents vibe that takes place. They think we are all transplants from Ill. There was even a disgruntled Kenoshan at the school board meeting shouting that a decision was only being accepted because of all the f****ing Ill transplants out by the interstate. Its Bananas.

So I found Faith's little declaration "Yeah were in Kenosha" kind of brilliant. Like even at the tender age of 4 she is aware of the perceived continental divide between Pleasant Prairie and Kenosha. Pray there is never a civil war secession between the areas. We would be first in the line of casualties. I just imagine the purist Kenoshan's charging across the town pitch forks in hand, red faced, and breathing hard looking for blood. Us living on the very boarder between the angry mob, and their Illinois Nemesis's.

Man people just will use any excuse to inspire outrage.

Risky Buisness

2008-05-23T07:55:00.000-07:00

Last Wednesday I was walking out of a local strip mall headed for my car when a large and menacing man smoking a Newport asked me if I could give him a ride to Super Valu (a grocery store located on the other side of town). I was of course hesitant as the man was very large, and I was alone. But I also couldn't help but feel as if this was one of those God moments where you can either trust or miss out. The man proceeded to tell me that the buses were down due to an accident on Green Bay road, and that he and his girlfriend just needed a ride. The girlfriend was inside the factory card outlet exchanging a teddy bear he had gotten her for some candy.
I decided to help them. There was a very bad accident, and even flight for life helicopters hovering overhead, but before I left the lot the buses had pulled in to gather and drop off riders.
The man went to get his girlfriend, and begged me not to leave. I said I wouldn't and quick called Kelly to let him know what I was doing.
The couple emerged, and the man introduced the girl as Anna but she said her name was Jill. They collectively gathers 8 small backpacks and climbed into the back seat of my van.
I neverously talked about my small children, and being a local school teacher. They told me wild stories about one another loosing jobs and fighting with friends at the hands of poor alcohol habits.
When we reached Super Valu the man kept thanking me, and repeatedly telling me not to forget the homeless. I told him plainly and honestly that I don't. Shaking hands we parted ways.

I wish I could tell you that I just gave the couple a ride feeling confident and assure of my action. But mentally I'd probably made at least seven different plans of how to escape my car in case either had tried to harm me. I kept a hand on my cell to call for help as well.

Later in the week I was recounting the story to my friend Ashely over breakfast, and we both agreed that even if it had resulted in my harm that goodness needs to be done for its own sake alone. If we keep hiding be hind consequences we will never be or see the changes we want to see in the world. We take so many risks for self gain, or even deceptive pursuits. But if we are not willing to risk for goodness well then much is already lost, and safety a much under estimated hindrance. I can't really say what kind of good it did shuffling these folks from one bus stop to another for them, but if it emboldened me to take more risks at the hands of goodness. Well then I guess they have been a much better agent of change than I have yet to be for another.

Anyone else been risky lately?